How can I divorce my Muslim husband?
Hi
I’m from Melbourne Australia. I’m a Muslim Shia and I’ve been married for 14 years. I have been separated NOW for 4 years and am finding hard to get a Muslim Shia divorce. All the sheiks here won’t give me one because it has to come from my husband, and what he says goes. They all know how he is. Islam is a man’s religion. I say it’s not fair. I have 3 kids and they live with me. I get no financial support, which I don’t want and yet my husband is making my life hell.
I lived in hell for 13 years. He says, he will never divorce me so he can ruin me. He says he will never let me remarry again. Why is it so hard for a woman to get divorced? I left him because I had no financial support from him. I worked all my life and he was very verbally abusive even in front of the children. My daughter suffered depression and was seeing a counselor at the age of 8. I’m 34 years of age and I’m entitled to find love and HAPPINESS. Please! I’m begging you to help me get out of this hell and help me get my divorce please.
Sara
Hi Sara,
This is strange. You have given all the power to your husband and a bunch of mullahs and are complaining that you are living in hell. This is like a caged bird complaining about her captivity when the door of the cage is open.
You live in Australia. Why do you have to go to the Sheikhs to get divorce? Why the divorce has to be Islamic? Go to a divorce lawyer and tell her you want to divorce your husband in accordance with the Australian law. Declare yourself a non-Muslim and you are no longer under anybody’s control.
If you were living in an Islamic country where the door of the cage is closed and locked, I would understand your plight. But I don’t understand why in Australia you have to cow-tow to Islamic laws?
The Sheikhs don’t have any control over you, unless you give it to them. In Islamic countries, where Sheikhs make the laws, the situation is different. If you live in the west, all you have to do is say sayonara to Islam and claim your independence and freedom.
If you fear your abusive husband, go to the police and seek protection. Maybe you have to change your city or even your name.
Start dating . Check out www.plentyoffish.com. The sea is full of fish. Make sure you don’t date a Muslim again. Life is better when it is shared with a loving partner.
Good luck,
Ali Sina
Hi Ali sina
Sorry I forgot to mention that I have been divorced Australian law. But how can I get it islamically because he will put my family in shame by spreading rumors that I have committed adultery if I did meet someone and my ex husband will continue giving my life hell and will ruin my name forever as I’m very well known and respected by many because of my honesty, purity and me as a human itself. I have many friends that know what kind of man he is and what life I had suffered with him for many years. My kids are very happy and I work full time to support myself and my beautiful children. I am happy doing it.
PLEASE CAN YOU HELP ME get a divorce islamically so I can get out of this whole and away from him and this whole mans religion itself!
Sarah
Dear Sarah,
Once you divorce according to the Australian law, you are divorced. You are giving legitimacy to a cult that does not deserve any. Islam is a lie. Unless you had a civil marriage as well, your Islamic marriage was null to begin with.
I can’t ask the Shiekhs to grant you your Islamic divorce. What I can do is to persuade you not to give power to them and to your husband to destroy your life. You are divorced in front of the law and that is all that counts. If your community does not understand this, leave it. You live in Australia. Find new friends who are supportive and understanding.
Find a good church that has support groups. Some years ago I found a Mennonite church that was not very far from me. I used to go there to meet people and to socialize. I liked the choirs and even the sermons. I attended also a bible study group. I was more knowledgeable about the Bible than anyone else. No one knew that secretly I was a non-believer.
There were support groups for divorced people. After the lecture we used to meet in a large hall. Food was simple and cheep. But it was an occasion to sit with other humans and interact. I moved and I have not tried to find a church again. I strongly recommend you do so. If you have small children, they need also to have that special experience that is only possible when you are a child. Bahais also have good Sunday classes for children and they are open to anyone.
Stop empowering your husband, the sheikhs, and the Muslim community. We make ourselves victims of our own false beliefs. Do I give a damn what Muslims think about me? Of course not! Eventually they will come to see they are victims and I am free.
Your problem is not your husband. Your problem is your own fears. You have to work on yourself. Imagine Islam as a shackle on your feet. Now imagine you are given a key. Open those shackles and throw them away. Now see yourself free, with no fear from people and what they say.
Our backward Middle Eastern cultures (note that I did not say Islamic) are shame based. All that matters to us is the image. How others think of us? What they say behind our back? How can we keep up the appearances and make others see us as upright dignified people? Even if we feel like sh*t inside, we want to project an image of grandeur. This is our sickness. It is a personality disorder. Our cultures are narcissistic.
The westerners have based their culture on guilt. What is important to them is to feel good about themselves. They don’t give a damn what others think about them. As long as they are content with their conscience they are happy. As the result they don’t put their noses into each other’s businesses.
Cultural taboos weigh on us heavily. Only we can get rid of them. I have done it to a great extent, but not completely. It is not easy. I am a thinker and have an analytical mind. I always challenge my convictions, beliefs and feelings.
You can live with all these archaic beliefs that have been loaded on you through your upbringing or you can use your intelligence, find a more civilized community, find new friends that are liberated and start a new life. It is going to be hard to change, but at least allow your children to have that chance. They don’t have to suffer the way we suffer from mores of our primitive cultures.
Ali
In Islam the True Divorce can be done by husband or wife.if you hate your husbund for whatever reason you can Divorce him in the following ways : first step to go to sheikh of the appointed for Marriage affairs if he refuses he is opperesing you but you are Divorced in the sight of ALLAH ALMIGHTY EVEN IF YOU DIDNT GWT THE FORMAL DIVORCE PAPER. They are opperesing women in the NAME OF ISLAM which is completely A Huge LIE and most of the sheikhs they dont Issue you Divorce paper if the husband Refuses. It is aganist the Relegion of Islam. Tell your parents relatives in Iran that the Truth about Divorce in Islam is Women also can Divorce husband if she like to Divorce. it is the formality to ask the Divorce by following the Normal procedure in Islam by going to the islamic court. if they refuse the are oppressing you women and it is ahainis ISLAM. IN my country Ethiopia the sharia court gives Women Divorce paper if the women ask for divorce even if husband refuses.That is True Islam. For very near future the women will be no longer opperesed. the True Islam is going to prevail all over the world by Allah Almighty through Imam Mahdi (pbuh) and by the Deputy of Imam Mahdi (pbuh) Prophet Jesus (pbuh). women will have the Right to Divorce according The QURAAN and Tradition of Prophet Muhammed (pbuh).
Hello
@katrina
Good Joke!!!,only fools can think this extreme like ,wishing to swim out of crocodiles pond and making entry into Tigers den,bravo!!! B)
@Dear,
Before I suggest you something valuable I like to know why do you want divorce? And like to confirm for whom you want divorce? Hope, you are not in love with a non-Muslim? Please share with me so that could throw some light on this.
im Shia and I want to divorce my husband but his father wont allow me to divorce him my husband is and out of jail and he doesn't support me what so ever I wish never came in Shia law as it not fair women like me are not having their rights met as a Muslim women.. im converting to Sunni .. and im getting a sunna shack to divorce me ..
So you're saying that it's OK for Muslims to lie, according to the Koran.
s u r absolutely right…
True! Abuse does not have a religion, But it is a matter of fact that patriarchal cultures produce more abusive men. Islam is a patriarchal and male oriented religion. The Quran tells men that it is okay to beat their wives. Muhammad repeatedly said that women are deficient in intelligence. Many Muslim scholars equated women to animals, that only look pleasant to the eyes of men so that we men don't get disgusted by them for the necessity of procreating. The teachings of Islam are filled with such asininities. How can someone grow up and be exposed to these teachings and end up to be a sane person respecting of the women? We have to fact the reality. There is something very wrong with Islam and Muslims. Let us pull our heads out of the sand and face the truth. Truth in this case is very bitter but unless we don't swallow it, this culture of abuse will continue.
In Islam both men and women are abusive and sick. Who said Muslim women are saint. How can a person be so abused and grow up as a sane person. In Islam everyone is a victim and a victimizer. It is the entire culture that is sick.
Dear Sarah,
Simple is that if the court of the country grant you divorce then you are also islamically divorce as the khulla aur judicial divorce process is same as Australian Law, Christian Law or what ever law, its the process which Islam upheld not the religion of the judge of the country. SO you are divorce so enjoy. make sure your next husband christian or muslim is a man who love you and treasure you, religion can be changed accordingly but the abusive man will always be abusive regardless of his religion. Also don't think in Muslim only man is abussive, I was married to a very abusive woman for 12 years and the i divorced her and left home with my few cloths only because sanctity was the prime objective for me back then, you can't imagine that how much domestic abuse I have suffered. for the people who think muslim man is abusive then please re consider your opinion, abuse doesn't have a religion.
Thanks
Syed Mohammad Kashif Iqbal
Congratulations for escaping the tyrant Muslim. You should consult your county/ state's domestic violence department, or some other women's group. Victims of abuse may be eligible for discount/ waiver on divorce paperwork. Good luck.
Good luck to you and please spread the word everywhere. Don't let other innocent women go through the same hell.
Are you the ninth wife of a good muslim man, Narcole ?
I bet not even Muhammad himself can recite Quran.
So why demand their kids to be perfect in reciting Quran? Such silly crazy psychos these muslims are.
I'm a Christian woman. I've been separated from my verbally abusive, lying, controlling, Muslim husband for almost 2 years, but neither of us has filed for divorce because of finances. He has no respect for ANY women, including his own mother. I only stayed with him 18 months. All he wanted was a slave to serve him. Can you imagine such unacceptable behavior in the USA towards an American woman? His first wife put up with his rotten behavior for over 10 years. She must have nerves of steel. Fortunately, we live in different states; otherwise, I'd have to go "underground" as his first wife did, in order to avoid being stalked. My advice to all American women, when a Muslim man approaches you, RUN!!! Everything you hear about them is definitely true. It's a cult. They try to brainwash you. Since leaving that rotten Muslim, I've met a wonderful all-American Christian Southern country boy. Woo! Hoo! What a difference! Extremely respectful, soft hearted, sweet, kind, loving nature. The best decision I ever made was leaving that Muslim. As soon as I can afford to divorce him, I'm filing on grounds of abuse.
Get real my friend. If the non-Muslims cheat, it is because they cheat. But in Islam this cheating is legitimized and legalized. If you can't see any difference you have a serious problem. Theft happens all over the world and it is illegal. But if you have a religion that prescribes theft, you have a problem,. These two are not comparable.
You need to improve our knowledge of Islam. The wife abuse is part of Islam, prescribed in the Quran.
Night Lion,
Many people know what the real 'islam' is and they are running away from it like someone who avoids a plague. The administrator of this site is a good example. The woman's story is not strange at all. It is permissible in muhammadanism to beat a child who has not memorized his prayers or the quran. There is the case in Cardiff, Wales of a muhammadan woman who killed her son and burnt the body because he had brought 'disgrace' to the family by not being proficient in reciting the quran which is necessary for anyone who is to become a 'hafiz'. Interestingly, the woman has a degree from a secular university.
He can divorce at any time, but he is responsible for taking care of you for the next 3 months after. Please tell me how this is worse than the American practice of cheating on their wives with younger women, then replacing said wife before the divorce is even finalized, and dumping her on the streets with nothing because he got a prenup? I am an American myself and this disgusts me!
The problem here is not the religion. It is the people. Some men are possessive and abusive. I am an American and I have heard of so many cases similar to this one in which the husband was Christian, Jewish, atheist, etc. IT is not part of Islam to hold someone in a marriage against there will. If none of the sheikh's will give you a divorce, find someone who will. This sort of thing happens, especially when the man is particularly influential in the community. Islam is the truth. It is about kindness and respect. What is happening to you is not a part of Islam. And if anyone knew what the real Islam was, they would cling to it with their molar teeth and never let go.
Nah, this is what poligamy for. good men are less than bad men. Even less than women. sign of qiyamat number of men : women is 1:9. women should seek sanctuary from good men.
Hi Selda,
What do you think we can do? There is nothing we can do really. I am telling young women not to marry Muslim men. But even if they heard it, would they pay any attention? People do what they want to do. Of course I know these marriages are disasters, but there is no way we can stop them.
All we can do is publicize such stories. I receive them almost on daily basis. Why don't you start a blog and write about it. I created a multisite that you can use freedombulwark.net Write about your story. There are others like you. I will encourage them to do the same. Maybe someone will be saved by reading what you went through.
Another thing we can do is to ban Islam and do not allow Muslims to immigrate. This is something that ought to happen sooner or later. But for that to happen we need to change our governments and elect ones who care about our culture and freedom. We can even ban Islam and kick Muslims out of our non-Muslim countries. Let them multiply in Islamic countries, They can pose no threat to us there. They will just kill each other and we should stay out of it.
Hi i am from america. I have been married for 13 years. My husband started to make money from ebay 20.000$ every month and he left the house with a young prostitute and moved in new york in 2010. Like a year later they broked up and couple of months later my husband has become a member of a fundamentalist islamic group. They called themself naqhsabandi group. 1 year later his business has bankcrupt. We are divorced at May 2013. But court gave him a visitation right for our son. This summer my son visited him in new york . I was a guest in their guesthouse during that time. Because of ramadan month, he couldnt take care of my son well. He just started to teach our son arabic prays which is not our original language. My son locked himself in a bathroom for 3 hours 2 times. He was so scared of him. He said he slapped him and pushid him couple of times. And also says my son and I has an evil inside of our body. The last day of this guesthouse we had a fight about this. I told him to teach nicely. But he was so rude to talk with. He kicked me out and told me to stay at the hotel. I called 911 that night. Next day called CPS. They both told me that cant do nothing. My child doesnt show any bruise or mark on his body. How are we gonna protect ourselves from my x husband and his religious group? I even wanted to call human rights service. Since this country has a freedom of religious rights, our hands are tied up. Please help us!!!!
julie
Oh!!! girl you need Samura ,who is a Buddhist to solve your personal problem,what about Qur'an and its sura's ,the repetitions of which will make your hubby your servant .Of course now you realized Islam ,Quran and this thug Mohammed are fake entities .Please listen Dr Sina and discard it now ,your life will be fruitful OK.
Miah Abdu Rasul, Can you tell with hand on your heart about anything which is not made by the God in the whole universe ?
@Slave,
//You Hindu are cow worshiper, rat worshiper, river worshiper but not the worshiper of Allah//
And this despite about 1000 years of continuous Islamic reign over the vast sub-continental stretches!! This is a clear evidence that most Indians found a rat, cow or river far better than that filthy Muhammad!! What more evidence do you need to prove that Muhammad was worse than a rat!! Thanks for providing the evidence.
Slave mentality,
Since you are not a Hindu it is rather presumptuous of you to speak for that faith and make appointments where you lack the competence to do so. Wait for the Hindus to make whoever they wish their Avatar. Do not attempt to appoint for them. So far they have not given Dr Sina any position.Do not impose one on him or on the religion. You are exhibiting the true dictatorial tendency of a muhammadan who thinks he can decide to everyone.
Muhammad did not only call himself a 'prophet', he committed shirk by equating himself with his allah. Thus, for you to please allah and make it accept anything from you, you must first please Muhammad. Muhammad and allah are not conjoined or siamese twins, they are both sides of the same coin. If the Hindus worship cows, rats etc, they are more sensible because those things are living. Muhammadans bow to a degraded dead crook ravaged by acromegaly whose bones have completely disappeared. Because it is dead allah must be appeased with a lavish spilling of human blood. Hinduism does not shed human blood to appease any being.
There is no 'religion' or cult worse than muhammadanism.
@I-HATE-ISLAM
If Sina did not claim to be prophet Hindu will make/declare him new Avtar (Incarnation of God) which is bigger than even prophet. I am sure you are also a Hindu. You Hindu do not look at your own religion. You Hindu are cow worshiper, rat worshiper, river worshiper but not the worshiper of Allah. Hinduism is worst religion.
Slave mentality,
Dr Sina has never made a claim as outlandish as calling himself a prophet. He has not hesitated in calling Muhammad a sham. And even that is too pleasant a name to call such a crook.
He learned the truth about muhammadanism from the quran and the hadiths which striped bare the cult and exposed the evil and fraud in it. If Dr Sina had depended on the lies spewed out by the mullahs he would never have discovered the truth. Reading on his own brought him that valuable knowledge.
Demsci,
Let me assure you that that feeling is mutual.
I hate muhammdanism but never the muhammadan who would be as reasonable as anyone else had it not been for the evil machinations of the former. I believe, as all of you do, that if muhammadanism is truly exposed any reasonable person in it will see the evil and emptiness the cult thrives on. That is why it is a privilege for me to team up with all of you.
I must, however, appeal to all of you to tolerate my poor expressions as English is not my mother tongue. I only learn it as a second language and as such my fluency is very limited.
I take back "on so many issues" and change that in: "the diverse issues that Muslimah writes about"
"So many issues" was over the top.
Demsci,
Splendid. If they are adverse to honor killing, why does the quran prohibit muhammadan women marrying non-muhamman men? Any girl who violets this inhuman rule is branded an apostate who has besmirched the reputation of the family and faith. Having left her 'deen' the penalty is summary execution. Are they going to deny this?
Ali Sina, Robert Spencer et al back up their conclusions with lots of reasons, facts, texts of Quran-Hadith-Sira, explanations of them by influential Islamic schools of thought and clerics, all over the world, which are monitored very well in this day and age.
IMO you can only authoritatively speak about your own version of Islam. Too many muslims, learned and ignorant alike, contradict you worldwide, whilst also speaking like: This is what Islam teaches, ordains, forbids, allows in a general way.
And if we cannot blame Islam for sins of people, then consider we can also deny Islam praise for virtues of people. If you say blame misdeeds by Muslims not on Islam, but on Character, Culture, then we could riposte by saying do not praise Islam for noble actions by Muslims but praise their Character or Culture.
If you deny bad of Islam, we can deny good of Islam. It may be better to sort out where our differences in values and laws are and admit those differences openly. We can agree that both sides may have merits and disadvantages, and let people choose. But why always these denials?
Demsci,
Muhammadanism has making fun of other religions one of its cardinal principles. If it does not allow it, why do muhammadans call us such derogatory names like "kafir',.'infidel', 'unbeliever', 'filthy', 'vilest things'? The fact that we do not believer in muhammadanism does not make us unbelievers for we believe in something else. We are non-muhammadans.
Muhammadanism makes fun of my religion all the time because the quran disagrees with the core belief of Christianity and they use that to call us unprintable names.
Which is worse, making fun of or asking that non-muhammadans should be killed wherever they are found? O Yes!!! They make fun of us and go beyond that to do unspeakable things to all those who are different from them.
@Ali Sina
Yes Muslim are are different breed. They are best creation of Allah. They are faithful and loyal to the Allah. They are not hypocrite unlike non-believers. They never associate any partner with Allah.
Slave mentality,
God is an intelligent Being and when HE created man HE, gave him that intelligence to take decisions and adapt to changing situations. The laws which God gave are the basic framework on which man is to build on so that he can live in a world which undergoes conatant changes. God never meant that man will remain static when the world around him is perpetually in motion. But because the muhammadan is devoid of thought he wants an already made situation. The muhammadan allah did not envision a situation where people will travel in airplanes instead of the camel. To allah such technological marvel is 'haram'. Allah did not know that plagues can be prevented by clean environment or treated medically. So it promised martyrdom to anyone who dies in a plague. Allah did not know that abdominal diseases can be taken care of. Its response to such ailment is again martyrdom.
You remain eternally a slave whose mentality is completely disoriented that is why you want allah to crank up everything and spoon feed you with. If you are married, I pray you wait for allah to impregnate you wife or wives. By the way, there never has been any allah. You had Muhammad churning out his garbage as the laws of allah.
Thanks, I-HATE-ISLAM, that means a lot to me,
I wish to tell you that I eagerly read every post from Dr. Sina, Chuck, Sakat and YOU especially. I respect and enjoy them very much. I learned TONs of things from these posts.
I am here not because I hate Muslims, but because I love Democracy and Enlightenment and most of it's accompanying values. And I consider it a problem that a part of Islam and a part of the Muslims threathen those values, compete with them and stand in their way.
@I-HATE-ISLAM
But your prophet Ali Sina claims he learned the truth from Quran and credit should be given to Quran. But you non-believers engaged to down Islam all the time.
Hello Slave of Prophet,
You say: "We should follow only divine law/Islamic law." If you Muslims would gather in your own lands and all of the inhabitants are Muslims, then by all means let those MUSLIMS say: WE should follow only divine/ Islamic law.
But many humans are not Muslims, prefer different laws from Islamic laws, so are not bound to abide by them. And do not belong to this "WE" you mentioned.
What do you propose that the other humans, non-Muslims do? Submit to Islam or have their own countries and laws where they are the majority?
And don;t you think that the Minority Muslims should consider to migrate to Islamic countries where divine law is practiced? Or, otherwise, completely submit to democratic laws? completely disowning Muslims living in Democratic countries, who are disloyal to democratic laws? To you your religion, laws, and COUNTRY, to us ours?
Muslimah: "in Islam we are not allowed to make fun of other religions or oppress them"//
But anti-Islamists Daniel Pipes, Robert Spencer, Ali Sina and many others have shown the world that in Islamic teachings and practices in Islamic countries the followers of other religions do not have the same rights and advantages as Muslims. In Iran Christians are harassed and imprisoned. In Saudi Arabia the building of churches is forbidden, despite the presence of many foreign Christian workers, like Philippino's. Etc.
Look, it seems like you speak only about YOUR VERSION, YOUR INTERPRETATION of Islam. Why don;t you admit that? Or are you really authorised to speak what "ISLAM" is and is not, what it forbids and allows and ordains? While on so many issues other Muslims contradict you, in teachings AND in practice?
Sakat,
It is a rare privilege and honor for me to be associated with great men like Dr Sina, Chuck, Demsci, yourself and a host of others. I have come to learn a lot from all of you. Together we will do our bit to let the world see the light and the evil they call 'islam'.
//"By the way, in Islam we are not allowed to make fun of other religions or oppress them, only to educate and be educated so we can live in harmony."//
Well, Westerners and Indians cherish freedom of speech and therefore ARE ALLOWED to make fun of other religions, albeit with boundaries, for instance not on the street, or workfloor, and never with incitement to violence.
When it is an Islamic value that " making fun of religions" is a crime and punishable by law, then that is a completely contradicting value to a central Western value. Both sides should admit it and move on from there.
And you can't demand from Westerners to forbid making fun of Islam, just because Islam ordains not to make fun of other religions. Because the Westerners do allow everyone, including Muslims to make fun of all religions/ ways of life. And you can't make exceptions to that rule.
//"•Honor Killings – This is Bid'ah, an innovation and a completely CULTURAL thing!! NOT MUSLIM. If you take part in this, you have ALLAH TO ANSWER TO!!"//
You deny unmistakably Islamic rules and influences and occurrences. In "reliance of the Traveller" it says that murder is punishable by death but not punishable are parents or grandparents who kill their (grand)children.
You ignore the Islamic mindset of honour of the family and the animosity of Muslims towards young women who want to determine their own fate and faith even if the family wants them to marry or adjust to Islamic customs, for instance forced wearing of burqa or headscarf.
If you look worldwide you ignore occurrences where forced marriaged women in AFPAK who flee from abusing husbands are "honor-killed". You say nothing about the right of young girls to apostasize and it may be that you too, in case of an apostasizing girl, sanction "honor-killing".
If so, all you need to do to be honest, is to admit that Islam itself, in part, has very contradicting values to Western Democratic values, as is shown by "honor-killings".
But when you admit is, perhaps Muslims and Westerners can sort out their differences or try to live in separate countries in the future.
And if the bad things muslims do, can be ascribed to these bad things not belonging to Islam, but to some cultural cause, then in the same way the good things that Muslims do can be ascribed to some cultural cause, instead of belonging to Islam. Like your attitude towards honour-killing, in that you clearly show to have Western cultural values, NOT Islamic values.
Muslim law are made by Allah while non-believers law made by mare human being. Stoning to death for adultery revealed to prophet (PBUH). We should follow only divine law/Islamic law.
Muslimah: //•Stoning – so its alright for the armies of this world to punish people with worse treatments, but say someone commits adultery or kills someone else, we can't punish them?//
Stoning is very cruel death-penalty. But deathpenalty for murder is understandable. But for adultery? If you support death-penalty for adultery while we in the West do not consider it punishable by law at all, you live by very different values, in part at least, then us Westerners do. Both sides, Westerners and Muslims, should realise this, and not deny it, as Muslims so often do. If the values of both sides do differ too much, Muslims should consider to move to Islamic countries where their values fit in better than in Democratic countries.
Here is a link to what Ajmal Masroor said; he said it right away in the video; If you dislike this country so much, why don;'t you hand over your passport and leave". This was about the woolwich killer, but I see it in the wider context of Muslims living the West while maintaining very different, contradicting values to the vast majority of Westerners. and Muslims with loyalties to hostile or contradicting entities, like the Ummah, or Islamic countries.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=00WRRD7Yud4
And if you excuse stoning by pointing towards alleged crimes done by armies, then I see that as "Tu Quoque". I think, the wrongdoing of some cannot excuse the wrongdoing of others, in a court of law, or in honest consideration.
I-HATE-ISLAM
Man you are enough to destroy this fallacy called Islam ,hats up!!!!
A Muslima wrote:
"First of all, Muslims: STUDY!!! Don't just be a muslim in name." That seems a very good suggestion. Let us call Muslim In Name Only; MINO'S. There seem to be plenty of MINO's in the world. Many anti-Islamist like Ali Sina, Robert Spencer et al and their readers/ commenters do know a whole lot more about Quran-Hadiths-Sira's then those MINO's do.
A Muslimah,
What is there to take pride in a religion whose deity equates a woman to a black dog, donkey and a 'Jew' all of which it regards as vile in its presence? What honor do you derive from being told that women are the fuel that keeps hellfire burning because they are perceived to be ungrateful to their husbands? In all your glorification of muhammadanism, it seems that you have lost sight of the fact that your husband can whip you if he thinks that you are rebellious. Ride on and enjoy your muhammadan paradise here and in the hereafter. But don't confuse others.
Muslims are a different breed… Hahahahahahah!!! Oh you are quite funny!
Muslim or not, many men cheat, lie, hurt and are just horrible. Many women too. After you're done with critisizing Islam, will it be the Christians, the Catholics? The Jews? The sins of people are not the same as their religious beliefs. Uh, being Muslim they're SUPPOSED to treat their women with love and respect and not touch those that are not married to them. But if they do, doesn't that mean they're ignoring their religion?
Find a good man, period. They are few and far in between but there are some. Stop blaming people's religion and blame their CHARACTER. Such narrow-mindedness is shocking.
Haha can't even understand what you said 🙂 mo? Uh… This isn't the Simpsons! Stop calling PEOPLE prostitutes because they got deceived! You are no better than the extremists. Maybe you are one? And a liar? Do you know her? Because you obviously don't know jack about Islam 🙂
I'm a proud Muslim and I have never seen a better marriage than the one between my parents, but there are many other Muslim marriages that have broken down because of many reasons. They are only human and Islam is not the problem.
May Allah protect us from those such as you.
*not a prison like other people say. – human error.
Do you know the reasons WHY?
•Burqa – it is our protection, the one layer we get to protect our beauty. I feel disgusted when men look at me with their perverted gazes and women look at me with envy. It's not a prison like you say just because you don't understand how LIBERATING – yes, liberating! – it is to not be bullied and used for our beauty!
•3x Talaq – it is so that when a man has broken all boundaries in anger, they get to feel the consequences of their action. In most cases, the women are happier with their second husband while the ex-husband stews forever. 🙂
•Stoning – so its alright for the armies of this world to punish people with worse treatments, but say someone commits adultery or kills someone else, we can't punish them?
•Harems – were a thing of the past. It's a TRADITION, not religious at all Sure, or Prophet had one but that was because unlike men nowadays, he actually married widows and women who couldn't take care of themselves in those days.
•Child Marriages – In Islam, when a girl has her first period, she is able to have children. So they are MARRIAGEABLE biologically. But if you told my mother to give me up at 9 to an old man she would have told you to jump off a cliff! The story of Aisya RA is different – she was taken care of first, then when she was mature enough it was consummated. Why should you have any issues with that? Separate what HUMANS do VS what religion that person is!
•Polygamy – AGAIN, lots of rules. You need to be rich enough to provide for them equally – so at least separate rooms or houses, if one has a driver the other has to as well, the amount of nights spent must be equal and if you are to follow in the Prophet's footsteps, only when the women need help should you take them as wives. But because other men are usually not honourable, they get to only marry 4 wives, and also they need PERMISSION from the wife. But most men don't care – and they will be judged on that on Judgement day.
•Honor Killings – This is Bid'ah, an innovation and a completely CULTURAL thing!! NOT MUSLIM. If you take part in this, you have ALLAH TO ANSWER TO!!
•Marrying the Son's Wife – HAHAHA!!! this is the story of Zayd if I'm not mistaken. He was the ADOPTED son of the Prophet. No blood. And he offered too, which the Prophet refused. When Zayd decided to go forward with it anyways, Allah made sure that the ex wife was responsibly taken care of by the Prophet. LEARN people!
Terror is a basic tenet of Islam? LOL please stop 'learning' from the mornonic media bullshit that is so rampant nowadays. You know nothing real.
By the way, in Islam we are not allowed to make fun of other religions or oppress them, only to educate and be educated so we can live in harmony. EXTREMISTS are waywards and don't deserve pity nor support from us, once they act on their desires.
There are more I'd like to add but if you really want to know more, go and learn yourself. Don't be sheep.
PS: And who says women can't work in Islam???? As long as it doesn't put them in harm's way, make them neglect their family or even work with the opposite sex who may take advantage of them, they can do whatever they want as long as their Parents & Husbands think they will be Safe! Even driving – that's a completely CULTURAL thing not to allow women to drive! For one, I myself don't want to end up like the many cases of co-ed workplaces where people succumb to lust – ie. in mostly western countries. Case Closed.
Hi!!! ,A Muslimah,Right here in this site a latest letter written to Mr Sina by an ex Muslim has appeared,the title of the letter is "I am Free From Islam " ,please go through it, how disgusting your Allah stands for you will come to know.
Dear God. If you know no facts, and only the fact that you have been abused by PEOPLE – religion has little to do with it if anything (for example this sister a ex-husband: if he was a real believer he isn't allowed to act like that) – don't bother giving your worthless opinions!
First of all, Muslims: STUDY!!! Don't just be a muslim in name. There is Khula (where a woman asks for divorce, but has to return any gifts and the dowry to be free), and of course there is alimony. If anything, for example if a man has promised a dowry for you and even after divorce has to give it to you. Of course, if he doesn't give it to you, it's on HIM not Islam & he will definitely have to pay for it on Judgement day. Alimony too, if you have children, are breast feeding etc they MUST provide! If they don't, THE MAN is at fault, not the religion. Islam has guidelines, but humans are humans and in the hereafter will be punished for it, if not in this world. May Allah keep you strong sister, for you and your children. Don't let him take advantage of you, for he does not sound like a Mu'minin to me!
Don't listen to these people so ignorant of the actual rules in Islam sister. They know nothing and will continue to know nothing unless Allah opens their eyes to the truth.
To the people who say our scarves ruin our beautiful hair – people sleep on silk pillowcases to preserve the hair – and you say it ruins our hair? Haha!
Don't be sheep who only know one side. 🙂
As far as i know..if you have no intimate relations with your husband after 4mths, you are divorce in the eys of Allah..there is a chapter name divorce in the quran
The marriage of China's stock market and Australia's currency split earlier this year, but an ugly reunion is on its way.This coming week, data will either confirm or refute the China slowdown. Inflation measures such as the consumer and producer price indexes will be released, as well as indicators on industrial production.
My husband is a Shia muslim and for how many times he said we are already divorce just only on his mouth.Is it true that,that's automatic we divorce?
Besides this horrific evil barbaric act of torturing an innocent Syrian Christian youdng lady to death, there are also so many other evil atrocities committed by those mad barbarians ie. cutting heads off. The only solution to end all these nonsense and to achieve world peace is to send all these troublemakers back to their SA desert if they choose to continue to worship that bloodthirsty allah and that mad dead dictator because that is the only place where they could behave themselves under the Sharia laws.
LET EVERY HUMAN BEING GO TO THE LINK PROVIDED BY DR. SINA. THE PICTURE THERE IS REVOLTING. LET ANYONE WHO CAN, POST THAT PHOTOGRAPH TO EVERY MEDIA HOUSE, WHETHER BIG OR SMALL, EVERY LEGISLATOR WHOSE EMAIL CAN BE ASSESSED, RELIGIOUS ORGANIZATIONS, GOVT OFFICIALS, ACADEMICIANS ETC.. THEY HAVE TO SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING AND COME TO TERMS THAT IT COULD HAPPEN TO THEM OR SOMEONE CLOSE TO THEM. SOME OF THEM MAY NOT GENUINELY BE AWARE OF THESE ATROCITIES.THERE HAS TO BE A BOMBARDMENT OF THE MEDIA HOUSES. THAT WAY IF THE MAJOR ONES REFUSE TO CARRY THE STORIES, THE SMALL ONES WILL. THE IMPORTANT THING IS TO CREATE PUBLIC AWARENESS TO THE GENOCIDE GOING ON AROUND US SO THAT THE TRUTH DENIERS WILL HAVE NOTHING TO DENY.
PLEASE, WE HAVE TO ACT NOW. LET EVERYONE DO THE BIT THAT HE/SHE CAN AND SAVE HUMANITY.
Dear Ms Dr Ali Sina, my heart resonate with you when I saw that horrific picture. :'(
Dr. Sina, I am completely broken by what was done to that pretty Christian Syrian girl in the link you directed to. Ever since I saw it the tears have not stopped flowing from my eyes. What depraved mentality could possibly commit such a crime! I wonder if the dullards in Washington, London, Paris, Oslo,Berlin and their useless main stream media have seen it. What answer can they give. After the Boston bombings, Horowitz, of the New York Times, wrote an editorial castigating a Republican Senator for saying that the motivation for the act was islam. Please let someone tell me if Horowitz has seen this picture and why there is no editorial on the plight of Christians in Syria and other muslim countries Why has he not vilified the perpetrators?. Let every decent human being rise in total condemnation of this barbaric creed and join hands towards it elimination. It is the worst plague to hit humanity.
This girl gives me the right http://www.faithfreedom.org/?p=3199
Not only we have the right, we have the duty to stop you demonic religion.
Leanna, the same right that muhammadans have to talk about non muhamadans and their religion is the same right that non muhammadans have to talk about muhammadanism and muhammadans.
Ali
What gives you the right to talk about Muslim and there religion like that. You are a hypocrite.
First of all he hasn't married you islamically..you need witnesses in an islamic marriage so u r not his wife and he has committed adultery with you..Once a man is married to a woman, there is basically no covering or shame between husband and wife….So this man doesn't know what Islam is..Allah would never love such a man who would treat his wife like that…A man is to not only to love and respect his wife but satisfy her sexual desires as well…..
@Celia,
She does not need to do anything to satisfy Islamic law. This gives Islam and its laws credibility. She is divorced by Australian law and that is what counts. Islamic law has the same value that the laws made up by Jim Jones have. Those who stop believing in Islam should not give any value to its laws.
@Celia,
//He wrote Surah IV in defense of women//
The one with gems like:
Half the inheritance for women vs men.
Q 4:11 (Yusuf Ali) – God (thus) directs you As regards your children's (Inheritance): to the male, A portion equal to that Of two females:
House arrest till death for women, till repentance for men for the same crime:
Q 4:15 (Yusuf Ali) – If any of your women Are guilty of lewdness, Take the evidence of four (Reliable) witnesses from amongst you Against them; and if they testify, Confine them to houses until
Death do claim them, Or God ordain for them Some (other) way.
Q 4:16 (Yusuf Ali) – If two men among you Are guilty of lewdness, Punish them both. If they repent and amend, Leave them alone; for God Is Oft-returning, Most Merciful.
The rules of Islam give you the right to divorce a husband who has not supported you and who is abusive to you. You need an attorney specializing in international Islamic law and witnesses to his bad behavior. As you know, divorce by Islamic law is a 3-tiered process. A lot of the time divorce via a "foreign" government (Australia, for instance) is given the legal status of having completed tier 1. Since you are living apart for greater than 1 year, not having intercourse with him, and not pregnant by him, an attorney specializing in Islamic law should be able to help you accomplish tiers 2 and 3. The prophet (PBUH) never intended for women to be objects of abuse. He wrote Surah IV in defense of women. I think your issue may be in not having the right attorney.
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SAL; ISLAMIC culture is from ISLAM, what you follow and practice , the rules, the traditions, the sayings, doings of Mo and HADIS and SIRA and QQUURRAAN. How come ISLAM is unable to remove bad culture as you say ? Actually , it is opposite. BURQA, 3 X TALAQ, STONING, Killing, HAREMS, keeping thousands of women as concubines, child marriages, , polygamy, treating unbelievers with hatred, practicing bigotry all this is ISLAMIC culture. daeth penalty for apostates, blasphemy, requring 4 witnesses of male moslems in case a moslmah is raped – all this is part of ISLAM. Marrying sons wife by father in law , terror all these are very basic tenets of ISLAM.
Total GARBAGE and lies FARAH . Read SIRA, READ HADIS, READ QQUURRAAN. Look at ISLAMIC culture in SODI BARBARIA , PAKISTAN< YEMEN, SOMALIA, SUDAN, CHAD, AFGHANISATAN etc.
yasmine , READ my response to SAWM below . by the way did you read SIRA ( BIOGRAPHY of MO ?) DID you read all of HADIS ( SUNNA OF MO ) , DID you read QQURRAAN ? DO you take a look at and examine ISLAMIC culture in SODI BARBARIA, PAKISTAN, AFGHANISATAN, Yemen, SOMALIA< SUDAN, CHAD , IRAN etc ? DO you examine ISLAMIC societies ?
READ, SIRA, READ ALL of HADIS, READ QQUURRAAN, take a look at and examine ISLAMIC culture in SODI BARBARIA, PAKISTAN, AFGHANISTAN, YEMEN < SOMALIA< SUDAN< IRAN, etc. ISLAM is barbarism, ISLAM is hatred for all unbelievers, ISLAM is fascism, ISLAM is sex, slavery, ISLAM is violent, killing, ISLAM is fascism. You know what is harem ? Moslem rulers used to keep thousands of sex and concubines in HAREM , gaurded by eunuchs !!!! A moslem man can have 4 wives at any given time !!! A moslem man can divorce his moslemah by saying 3x TALAQ !!! In case of rape , a moslem woman needs 4 male moslem men as witnesses !!!! In case of rape a moslemah can be stoned to death . A Moslemah can not fall in love and marry a nonmoslem man !! but a Moslem man can marry a nonmoslem woman !!! If a moslem leaves his/her religion by her own choice, then he/she will be killed !!!!! But nonmoslems can be converted to ISLAM !!! How demonism is it ?
Read SIRA, READ , all the volumes of HADIS , READ QQUURRAAN, look at and examine the ISLAMIC culture, ISLAMIC societies, ISLAMIC countries like SODI BARBARIA and PAKISTAN, SOMALIA, SUDAN, YEMEN,IRAN etc. ISLAM is hate filled, most bigoted, killing, violent, intolerant, fascist, slavery.
SABRA : Moslem man pays MAHR ( buying a moslemah ) ( actually it is called NIKHA which means penetration of vagina of a moslemah by the penis ) . In ISLAM ( in other cultures it is called marriage ) NIKHA ( which is bought by the Moslem man ) is a contract . If a Moslem man wants and nothappy with his wife, he can TALAQ her by uttering 3 X TALAQ !!! SO, IN ISLAM, a moslem woman is a sexual robot, just to attend the sex needs of the moslem guy. A moslem man can have 4 wives at a given time , !!!! which means a moslem man can divorce his moslemah and replace that slot with another woman !!! Mo was a monster. KHADIJA was not a moslem nor MO was a moslem when they got married first !!! ISLAM came later !!!!Before marriage KHADIJA was a business woman proves that Preislamic ARABIA was better for women !!!! But ISLAM brought slavery,repression,oppression and persecution and torture to MOsLEMAHS .. !!!
MO was a hate monger, a bigoted fascist and misogynist , slave trader, slavery perpetrator and slavery promoter, a sex maniac ( Mo had sex slaves ) , a pedo, a rapist, Mo was a liar, a lecher , a killer, a robber , a ruffian, a mafia gangster , a criminal. Mo married 6 yr ols AISHA when he was 54 yrs old . MO married his adopted sons wife , when he saw her in izar , he got erection and his pimp ALLAH readily agreed that to marry his sons wife is permitted by ALLAH !!! DO you know all this information ? Read SIRA ( biography of MO by Ibn ishaq and ibn tabari ) , Read all HADIS, READ QQUURRAAN. EXamine your own ISLAMIC culture , EXAMINE ISLAMIC societies , ISLAMIC countries like SODI BARBARIA and PAKISATAN ,SUADAN, SOMALIA, Yemen, iRAN etc.
SHAIDA is the follower of a Monster called MO and who was a liar,lecher, robber, hate filled and bigoted criminal, sex maniac, slavery perpetrator and slavery promoter, a fascist, a pedo, and a rapist. Do you want proof.Read HADIS, READ SIRA, READ QQUURRAAN. Examine ISLAMIC culture, ISLAMIC societies and ISLAMIC countries like PAKISATAN, SODI BARBARIA, AFGHANISTAN, SUDAN, SOMALIA, IRAN, KUWAIT, YEMEN , etc. You are brain washed Moslemah and a liar too.
your advice is rubbish and totally absent of thought and understanding of the obligations this lady feels for her way of life…… I admit it is not as easy for a muslim woman to divorce a man but that is not to say it cannot or isn't performed in many countries….. i advice that you gain knowledge of the rights of women in islam my sister and pray allah gives you strength to do things the right way so that you feel what you have done is in accordance to your path – please do not listen to these idiotic people who are totally ignorant of the beauty of islam and only want to use your pain to try to take you away from the righteous path.. the christian law is not that great neither as if you want to divorce your partner you have to prove you have separated and spend years in court which is expensive and soul destroying….and if you are catholic well they dont even believe in divorce at all ..allah knows best not the human being- my prayers are with you and i hope you gain strength in the knowledge that there are sisters out there who will pray for you in your quest
this man was just playing with your heart a true muslim man will love and respect his wife this is what is expected from him – also in terms of divorce a muslim woman can divorce her husband if she is able to prove that he did not fulfil his duties as a husband towards her… the guidelines are there to protect the dignity of women – as almighty knows best….. as a woman i feel your pain to be in a loveless marriage to a man who used your ignorance of islam to justify his own agenda…simple your best approach would have been to empower yourself with knowledge of islam and the rights of women….. i hope and pray you find happiness with someone who truly appreciates and loves you for who you are
Why a prophet need ,several wife at the first instance.Secondly,at the age of 52 when any body cant become absolute master of bed to satisfy a mature lady,opted for fornication with 6 year old child.Look no God of other religion,community on earth restrict woman from doing independent businesses. In India there are many women CEO on radar,forget about doing business ,they climbed the peak of Everest ,went to outer space and had sacrificed their life for higher understandings,they are wrestlers as well to claim the Olympic medals.There is nothing of codified dictation by God , of what woman has to do and not to do like sorts in their scriptures ,because the nature has created those things in us with our birth( no boy or girl think about sex in their child hood? and ,why they gain that knowledge ,when they reach puberty.) ha,ha,ha…… scrape the Allah and his altar ego MAD MOHAMMED,very simple ha,ha,ha…..
The wife is financially independent from the husband. Islam has protected woman’s independent personality and ensured her full capability to be financially independent from her husband.
Muslim women have the right to earn money, own property, to enter into legal contracts and to manage all of her assets in any way she pleases. She can run her own business and no one has any claim on her earnings including her husband. The Quran states: "and in no wise covet those things in which Allah hath bestowed his gifts more freely on some of you than on others: to men is allotted what they earn and to woman what they earn: but ask Allah of his bounty for Allah hath full knowledge of all things." (4:32)
This was clear in the house of Prophethood itself where Mother of the Believers, Khadija, may Allah be pleased with her, who had a very successful trade. Before she married the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, he managed her trade successfully which was their first introduction to one another. After the marriage and after Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, started the call for Islam, He never asked his wife Khadija, may Allah be pleased with her, to spend any money for Islam however she voluntarily spent lots of her money whenever she felt that it is for the benefit of Islam
The husband is financially fully responsible for his wife. Poor or rich, her living costs are estimated in proportion to her husband's financial ability. The Qur'an puts it thus:" Let the rich man spend according to his means". (Surah 65:7).
He is obliged to provide her with food, clothes, a place to live and medical treatment according to his environment, conditions and income. Muslim scholars said that if a man does not support his wife financially then she has the right for a divorce.
The Prophet, greetings and peace be upon him, said stating the rights of women, "You are obliged to provide them with food and clothes honourably". Honourably here means what is conventional according to people of faith and honour, without extravagance or meanness.
( Transmitted by Abu Dawud (1905); Ibn Majah (3074); Al-Doramy in Kittab Al-Mannish p.440 on the authority of Jabber; Ahmad 5/73 on the authority of Abu Gara Al-Raqashi's uncle.)
Living with them honorably, this includes respect her and pay attention to her needs, never ever reveal the secrets of the household and those of the married couple. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said that the best charity (sadaqa) is that spent on one's wife, patience and forgiveness in the case of disagreement or dispute, and not rush to divorce, good manners, sweet words, a smiling face, a pleasing playfulness and an amusing mien, etc. The Prophet, greetings and peace be upon him, said, "The most faithful believers are the best in manners and the most gentle of their own people".(Transmitted by Al-Termithy on the authority of Abu Huraira – 1162)
Ibn Hibban transmitted on the authority of Aisha that the Prophet said, "The best of you is he who is the best to his family, and I am the best to my family". 124 (Transmitted by Ibn Hibban Charity (El-Ehsan) Vol. 9 (4177)
The actual biography of the Prophet, blessings and peace be upon him, has proved his gentleness towards his people, his excellent conduct with his wives, to the extent that he used to help them with their housekeeping. The extent of his playfulness is shown when he raced Aisha twice; she won the race once and he won the second time. He then said, "This for that".
Bro Bilal, I think you are from Pakistani Rajput background. You seem to be Sunni. If she wants you to be Shia. will you agree?
Horseshit, the polytheistic religions of prechristian Britain had relatively equal roles for men & woman as well as female rulers(ex. boudica) they predate islam by thousands of years.
http://www.hreoc.gov.au/racial_discrimination/…/law_re...
This is worth a read for those in need, but I'm sure a search will yield more!
James
I think a restrain order might be useful as well! Especially if there's any chance of abuse or violence.
It might not stop an abuse from happening, but if it happens he is then in contempt of court, which it a serious offence. Maybe seek help from an Australian lawer? There must be one who'll support you for a minimal fee, knowing your predicament. At least a little advice shouldn't cost to much.
I am amazed at this problem since any immigrant is accepted on the grounds that they accept Australia law. It might be more complex for Australian born Muslims though.
Good Luck
James
hi all of you there! i viewed all of the comments made by you, most of them were made on the sentimental and emotional grounds and not on the practical grounds. some were made on the basis of personal resentments and some were taken as offensive. it is good to give suggestions when when a person is not involved himself or herself physically and emotionally. but everything has to be bared by the sufferer , they dont only need a solace but a practical solution for their problem! we must help these needful people not being as a muslim,christian or whatever the faith or faithless but being as humans as we must see it as a moral ethical and social duty….why are we expecting every solution in our religious texts when its practicability after their thousands of years of birth is impractical at this time:?
Get a fasagh, you can already get a divorce cos you have not slept with him in the last 6 months. This reason alone is enough for a fasagh
if u u r Australian then be Australian be strong and leave him contact police if needed
I'm australian and have been married to a Muslim dog for 10 years and has treated me like crab abusive ,forced sex calls me a sharmuta all the time And has poisoned my daughters brain against me ,hes threatens me everyday if I leave my life has been a living hell and I will tell the whole world what these people are and how they've been brought up.im threatens if I meet another man he will kill me and my parents and it's fights everyday. My life is helll
http://www.change.org/petitions/the-president-of-…
http://www.change.org/petitions/the-president-of-…
Can you get a divorce if your husband refuses to pay rent, and only wants to pay one bill. Has cheated on you with several women and given you a STD. How can I get him to move out and divorce me. He is muslim and I'm Christian.
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We have not sent you(the prophet of Islam) but as a mercy to the worlds." The Holy Qur'an (21: 107) The Prophet was known for his honesty, mercy and forgivness above all things he even forgave his enemies who tried to kill him, expelled him from his home, killed and a persecuted his family members and his followers. But when he became victoriouse he forgave them. Even Hind was forgiven( a women whose father and brother were killed by muslims when they were in a meccans army that attacked out numbered muslims in battle of Badr. Hind got her slave to kill the uncle of the prophet called Hamza in a later battle and she ate Hamza's liver after the battle. The Prophet loved his uncle greatly but even then he fargave Hind when he could have killed all his enemies after mecca was conquered by muslim. The personel sacrafice of the prophet is clear when he forgave her but told her never to appear before him.
where did you get this story from about tearing a women limb from limb when she was breast feeding her baby? In Islam even if a woman is sentenced to death for anything she cannot be killed as long as she is breast feeding. Alot of the tales are spread by so called muslims who actually hated the prophet and wanted to redicule him, because they were family of Hind who continued to hate the Prophet and Islam but they converted to Islam after the Prophet forgave them after winning the wars. they wanted to destroy islam from within, just read history and you will know that "islam" that you hear about is what the prophet's enemies preached so people would come to hate it. they took the governmnemt and oppressed and massared his family. just lookup what happened in karbala in 61 years after hijra( islamic calander) and you will know every thing about diffrence between the islam of the Prophet and Islam of his enemies.
Before islam doughters were baried alive and sons inherted their mothers as wifes when their fathers dies and generally women had no rights what so ever. islam did alot to help them. if you want to blame ignorant muslims who justify their own evil deeds by blaming worped islam then go ahead but same can be done to every religion.
The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.), addressing the Muslims on the occasion of the farewell Pilgrimage warned them against the values which he feared would be neglected after him, and referred to woman as one of the important issues about whom he said: "Observe your duty to Allah in respect to the women, and recommend them to be well treated."
According to the Imam Ja`far Al-Sadiq (a.s.), the Prophet stressed his proximity to woman and her position in his life, by saying: "It is of the manner of the Prophets to love women." He is also quoted to have said: "I do not think that a man gets better in faith without loving women better."
nic
You wont get right solutions here because Islam, Muslims are seen as problems here and your problem is very much personal. Hope you and your best mate will find peace and respect for each other.
A man who says perverted things to his daughter in law does not deserve any respect. You need to put your foot down and tell your husband that this is absolutely unacceptable and if this goes on you will refuse to live under the same roof as your father in law. If your husband loves you, he will understand and find another place for his father to live.
Divorce your husband immediately he is a muslim he don't care you don't love you.
It was very unwise for your husband to invite his father to live with his family in the same house. This happens a lot in Eastern cultures but it always causes animosity and contributes to marriage break down. Your husband must realize that his responsibility is now to his own family and children. He must find another place for his father to live or maybe send him back to his country of origin where the cost of life is lower and he can send him money.
Before things get out of hand and you and your husband stop talking explain to him that living with the in laws is unhealthy. It is unhealthy in any culture but more so in Eastern cultures where parents don’t know how to respect the boundaries. Actually they don’t even know if there is a boundary.
If your husband does not remedy this situation and does not provide for his father another accommodation (preferably far away) I am afraid your marriage will be threatened.
hi i was wondering if anyone could give me advice. I am English and i married my muslim husband six years ago although we have been together thirteen years. My husbands family have always interfered
in our relationship by being spiteful and lying. In October last year i agreed for his father to live with us, but last week he said a perverted thing to me about me and i hate him now and don't trust him now with my children bring around him. I told my husband and he did nothing. Today a argument happened and i got mad and shouted at my father in law and now my husband is saying i have no respect and is really upset with me and our marriage is in turmoil i am so upset that my husband knows what he has done but is now upset with me for mot respecting his father what shell i do?
I believe everybody should take care of their own issues…as for us Muslim women, when we need u to stand up for us we'll let u know. Until then I speak for myself, i stand up for myself, just as my beloved prophet taught me to do. It's been known all over the world and religions, men mistreat women all the time, from the very start. Let's ask CHris Brown to stop beating women, and my Christian neighbour…sometimes I find it so hard to sleep at night coz of their fighting and him bashing doors and walls and her crying and screaming. Ok I gotta stop, coz this is the most time I've wasted on arrogant ppl. As for my sister, I had similar problems with an abusive husband, my own family would not allow me to leave at all, i wasn't very religious at all actually…I was anything but religious, parties, guys, fashion and so on. But I still believed in God. I started researching more into the Quran and hadeeths and found that it was my right to leave and that I shouldn't be treated anything less then the Queen I am. So anyway, i become closer to god and constantly asked for his guidence and to help me out of my situation. If I told u how my family was and their made up rules, u wouldn't believe I am divorced now, I am with a very religious muslim man, unlike my ex who said he was Muslim but followed his imaginary religion, this man treats me better then I ever thought a man is capable of treating a women. The only rules he forces on me are that there is no crying, so me crying is a no no. I suggest u research a little and find a sheik who is just. Because just because they call themselves sheik it doesn't make them right, as a matter of fact alot of them have just as closed mind as a lot of the other men in this world. Search for one that supports women's rights in Islam, usually u can spot out one who is afraid to not be just. Pray and ask for Gods help, because there is no one as just as Him. And please do not even read what these negative comments suggest, because people push forward, u don't go backwards. I wish u all the best, fight the world if u have to, if ur not doing anything wrong, nshallah Allah (SWT) will give u the courage to make ur own path. Take care and good luck
Peggy,
I was born in Australia and I am a Muslim. Unfortunately what you have said is true many muslim countries do have a high report of abuse towards women. But this is due to the fact that what is practised is teh culture not the religion. My own Mother would confuse her culture with the religion Islam. Islamis a very peaceful religion. I'm a bit confused…as you seem to be really uneducated in Islam and just take what you hear which is usually from the media. Islam has neva said to kill people from other religions…but if you are at war it is allowed?!! Hmmmm is it just me or is that what would hapen in war anyway. BUT Islam has respectful rules when it comes to war..it is not allowed to kill women or children it is despised and if you do… you are ordained to hell…if one is to surrender you are not allowed to even harm him. Why isn't called brutal and mad men or cults when the AMerican invaded Iraq and destroyed thousand of poeples lives……the american soldier raped hundrends of MEN and WOmen …it is sick…an american soldire actually did a video of other americans performing disgustng acts towards prisoner….all of this is not allowed in our religion. Islam has so much respect to women that men would wish they were women. If a man calls himself a muslims and does not do as Allah ordered or followed the practises of our Prophet Mohammed then he is not a muslim . Islam is in your soul…between you and God ….anyone can call themselves a muslim but are they in the eyes of Allah? Allah has ranks the Highest is Prayers… 2 nd highest is good treatment to your parents…and teh third is good treatment to women……. Prophet Mohammed last words ….were 'I hold you responsible to good treatment of women"…. a women in Islam should be treated like a queen….Our Prophet Mohammed use to sew, clean and help . He was the most kindest caring husband ever…..if you were to read about his life you would wish you had a husband like him. If you are not treated well or you hear about women not being treated well in Islam..then know they are not practising what Islam …or what our Prophet Mohammed PBUH taught us …… you can't go against history …facts that are there….and for the people who take a line out of a whole story of course it can mean what ever you want it to mean……..La Ilaha ill la lah…….(Thereis only but one God ).
Ali sinas book is full of human errors, none can be better than the perfect unchanged words of God I'n the magnificent Quran.
As for the bible may God guide you lost people who live with their wimbs and desires over the laws of their books.
I hear it day I'n day out – yes from Christians- they say- they don't have any role models. No one follows Christianity properly.
Dear ali sina!
It's sad to say that you offering friendly advice, but quite frankly you are enforcing christianity upon a vulnerable Muslim sister.
The devil has done wonders upon you, and if you do not come to your senses I will see you in hell
to sarah
if you havent had sexual intercourse for a long time and he doesnt give you money to support you than your already divorced in islamic laws you need to learn more about the quran god is fair to all men and women its been 4 years. which ever sheik your going to they dont understand much obviously so congratulatin your divorced tell your community that and also who cares what people think of you when you die you die alone not with people and when your sick you can only feel it no one else
Hi Sara! I am sorry to hear about problems in your family life. I hope you read my comment. Divorce is not difficult in Islam. I would suggest to go to Imam Sistani's website and read his fatwas about divorce. You mentioned that you haven't lived with your husband for four years…if you don't live with your husband for 5 years, you are practically divorced. You are free now to decide whether you want to get married again. If you are Shia, your question should be addressed to your Marja (scholar of Islam) and he will help you. People leaving bad comments without knowing the whole situation. Just go to Sistani's website and ask question. He will help you InshAllah. Good luck!
You get something called a Khullah. Ask or read about this especially in Islam there is always a way out for you as a woman dont listen to the wrong advice. Being muslim is not stopping you from getting a divorce it is the wrong advice. Again you need something called a khullah i dont know much about shia muslim as im sunni but all in all should be same.
Here is wicki info on it
Khula (Arabic: خلع) is the right of a woman in Islam to seek a divorce or separation from her husband. More accurately, it is merely the right of a wife to seek a release from the marriage bond, similar to the Get in Judaic law, but unlike the latter where the husband has unilateral right to refuse, a Muslim woman may petition a qadi to grant her divorce – over ruling the husbands refusal. This authority of the qadi is subject to certain criteria which differ amongst the jurisprudential schools (fiqh), and subsequent to attempting reconciliation between the parties, failing which further arbitration to seek an amicable solution and voluntary proclamation of triple talaq by the husband.
Ultimately the qadi has authority to grant the divorce subject to the wife fulfilling requirements to return the mahr and compensate the husband by reimbursing him for what he provided during marriage, unless the husband is willing to forgo it, (which the qadi usually encourages) unless the woman's action or behaviour has been such not to warrant it.
After divorce, the husband is responsible for the education and maintenance of the children. The children live with the mother for seven years. After seven years, the children have the right to live with the father or the mother, as they decide. There is differences between scholars in regards to the number of years a husband is obliged to provide for the welfare of the children of the marriage, and who is to reside with whom.
A woman seeks a khula while a man gives a talaq. The iddah period (waiting time after a divorce) of a woman who seeks a khula, is one menstrual cycle or one month if she is post-menopause i.e. ceased menstruating. This is to ensure she is not pregnant. This differs from when a man gives a talaq; the iddah period is three cycles or three months. The iddah period also allows for reconciliation between the husband and wife. If the woman is pregnant, then the waiting period is until she gives birth. There is still the need for witnesses when seeking a khula as in a talaq.
There are differing opinions regarding the iddah (waiting period) for a woman after the khula has been granted, the support of a one month waiting period is taken from the following hadith and Qur'anic verses.
".. When Rabia bint Masood obtained Khula from Thabit, the prophet asked her to wait until one menstrual cycle before she could go to her home". (An-Nissai, Abu Daud, Tirmidhi)
"…And for those who are pregnant (whether they are divorced or their husbands are dead), their iddah (prescribed period) is until they deliver (their burdens)…" (Qur'an 65:4)
Also the mahr does not have to be surrendered in full if the husband does not request the entire amount. The basic principle concerning this is the following verse from the Qur'an (interpretation of the meaning) stating:
"..Divorce must be pronounced twice and then (a woman) must be retained in honour or released in kindness. And it is not lawful for you that ye take (back from wives) aught of that which ye have given them; except (in the case) when both fear that they may not be able to keep within the limits (imposed by) Allah. And if ye fear that they may not be able to keep the limits of Allah (to deal with each other fairly), in that case it is no sin for either of them if the woman ransom herself (by returning what the husband provided). These are the limits (imposed by) Allah. Transgress them not. For whoso transgresseth Allah's limits: such are wrong-doers." (Qur'an 2:229)
You get something called a Khullah. Ask or read about this especially in Islam there is always a way out for you as a woman dont listen to the wrong advice. Being muslim is not stopping you from getting a divorce it is the wrong advice. Again you need something called a khullah i dont know much about shia muslim as im sunni but all in all should be same.
I pray you get out of your difficult situation. Pray for us all that we have a happy new year and new start.
islam was the first religion to give women rights?? are you a muslim woman?? a religion where the prophet had a breast feeding woman torn apart limb from limb while breastfeeding and commented that a goat would not lock horns over her ? Buddy your religion is a disease it is death for all who follow it
what the koran does teach violence towards women and the Sunna, the life of mohaammed supports it too! you obviously have read neither
Who's Islam? Certainly not Muhammad's Islam. We only talk about Muhammad's Islam here. If you don't follow Muhammad, don't call yourself Muslim. It gives you all the disadvantages and none of the benefits.
In Islam, what that man did is haram and is NOT allowable. I am sorry he used you. Islamically a man cannot marry anyone unless he has muslim witnesses; just saying it in front of Allah does not count and you are not married. There is also no rules saying a man cannot use his mouth or hands for sexual activities~the only restriction muslims have in regards to sex is that anal is forbidden; the rest if permissible.
Your "marriage" is not legal. I am sorry for your experience. Please know that Islam does not look well upon what he did and certainly doesn't allow it. Try not to think badly of all muslims because of the actions of one man (who most muslims would not consider muslim). Either way, on judgement day he will have to answer to what he did to you.
(I am a muslim.)
"Only God has a right to judge. Jesus told the stoners who were ready to kill a woman caught in adultery that YOU THAT ARE WITHOUT SIN CAST THE FIRST STONE." If that was the standard how would we ever have a functioning justice system? Imagine the murderers, rapists, racists, terrorists and all other scumbags coming out with this retort in a court of law?
The so-called hate you talk about. I believe it is more of an anger that you condone honor killings because you might have a family member that brings you shame. I believe you Muslims are full of hate. You want to put us to a higher standard than yourself? Well it doesnt work. YOU are like the ones you talk about. Many people see your games you play. What you just posted is a subtle hate. Do unto others as you would have others do to you. It goes both ways Jakob. Christians are human and do get angry just like you holy muslims. Sow us one muslim country that is perfet. Show me one muslim country that is lovong and kind to Christians. You people get away with murdering girls who were raped. Your Ayatollah Khomeini said it is ok to thigh baby girls at the breast. YES-that makes me angry. Stop being such a hippocrit. You are funny. Muslim countries have high crime only thing is is that it isnt called crime because it is against women. You make me sick. Please do not go on-you make yourself appear to be ignorant.
Make a life for yourself. Islam does not own you. The one true God is the only one who you answer to. God does not treat women the way Islam does. Free yourself from a religion that condones honor-killing. Remember Amina and Sarah Said from Texas who were honor-killed by their Muslim dad. Only God has a right to judge. Jesus told the stoners who were ready to kill a woman caught in adultery that YOU THAT ARE WITHOUT SIN CAST THE FIRST STONE. He also told the woman to go and sin no more because her sins are forgiven.
There are MANY non-Muslims who are modest. I feel very liberated being who I am and free to dress the way I feel is right. Being oppressed into wearing little clothing-now I heard it all. No one that I know of ever pushed me into wearing little clothing. Sounds like you are a little uneducated when it come to non-muslims. People who go without much clothing I would not call a born-again believer. Some of us have no desire to be educated about Islam because WE have our own relationship with the Creator-the one true God. I have no need to know about Islam because I do not bow to ALLAH or whoever he is. I would never worship or acknowledge a prophet who marries little girls. Honor killing is not something I want to know about. My people who are Native American and Southern Holiness wear modest clothes and are moral. It seems you are just as bad as the people you judge.
When we went to school, we were taught that colonialism was bad, but looking at the way things have turned out with resurgent Islam and Sharia, it would appear that the colonial powers did not rule long enough to displace Islam with civilized values.
"Islam is a perfect system"
Perfect in violence and oppression.
"Please pray to Allah"
Don't worry. Allah is Muhammad, who is safely dead and buried.
Hi Asina,
I feel sorry for you and your daughter in the situation you are in. In Islam, you have the right to divorce your husband who has been abusing you and you can put a restraining order on him. There is a difference, Islam is a perfect system but Muslims especially Muslim men do not follow it or do not adhere to the teachings of the be love it Prophet Muhammad S.S.W how treated his wives kindly and with care. Here is a proof from a hadith from the saying of the Prophet Muhammad s.s.w "The best of you are those who are best to their wives.” (Tirmidhi, Sahih) and another example of the quotes from the Prophet Muhammad S.S.W “The best of you are those who are best to their families.” (Tabarani, Sahih). “The best of the Believers is the most excellent of them in character.” (Ibn Majah, Sahih). As a sunni male muslim obviously women need to be treated with respect and if the wife wants a divorce than the Muslim male should be a man enough to fullfill the rights of it by following the procedures from the Qu'ran Verse 2: 229 : " A divorce is only permissible twice: after that, the parties should either hold Together on equitable terms, or separate with kindness. It is not lawful for you, (Men), to take back any of your gifts (from your wives), except when both parties fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by God. If ye (judges) do indeed fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by God, there is no blame on either of them if she give something for her freedom. These are the limits ordained by God; so do not transgress them if any do transgress the limits ordained by God, such persons wrong (Themselves as well as others).
Remember Muslims cause injustice to themselves but Islam brings Justice and equality and honor. Please pray to Allah and sincerely ask for the Lord's help to open a way for you to escape this nightmare.
Hi Sara my message was too long had to split it!…..Continued…..
There is no reason for the sharia court to question any reconsiliation or for you to remain married in Islam if his behaviour is such you describe and you are already legally divorced. It is unfortunate that many male muslims or so called muslims of particular sects of the religion believe they have power over the very belief they say they have and that is the descision is made by the almighty and his law alone not that to which they bring to their own favour.
Hello Sara
I have read some of the comments and your problem with your ex-husband. I didn't read any further comments as after I read two of them it was clear that the problem is not your religion but your culture is the one to blame for giving your ex-husband this belief he has power over you. Unfortunately he has been bought up with this and cant see past it. If he knew the rights that Sharia law gives you he would not threaten you in this way. Your Sheikhs are not true to Islam, as they are denying you rour right to choose your path as equal right to males in Islam and you most definatly have a case in a muslim court if your ex-husband has been abusive also. I suggest you seek the advice of the Muslim Sharia Council in London UK and I am sure they will grant you the muslim Divorce since you already have a legal Australian Divorce complete. Continued……
Dump the Baggage and move on. – Did your ex husband ever smoke or drink alcohol if he did then he is a blasphemer and will go to hell if he uses the Book to prevent you from moving on. I say Talaq, Talaq. Talaq to your ex husband.
We pray to the same Allah to give enough strength to read through the Quran/Sira/Tafseer and see who Muhammad is.
Remember when the sheep of a forest gathered together to pass a resolution to stay vegetarian, while the wolves of the forest were watching from the shadows. The sheep said, the wolves are taking part in the resolution :-(.
Hi Sara,
Even if you're a Muslim, which I can't see why you'd want to stay one in that oppressive community all you have to do is legally get a divoce from the Austrialian law. It's that simple. If the marriage was not by law but by only sheiks it's not really a marriage either. Don't let their backwards, oppressive culture hold you down. It's not YOUR fault, God doesn't preach violence towards women like that cult does. Change your religion if you must to think freely gain.
But GET DIVORCED with the Australian law. Get custody of your child or she may suffer a fate worse than yours in those devils' hands. And FORCE your husband to pay child support. Then GET a restraining order against him. That's how you get out of hell & give him the hell he deserves.
Do what I said, if not for you for your daughter. Or she could even end up in a brothel(if the Shiets get around the Australian law good enough) if your husband marries her to a guywho divorces her and sells her.
Pam, I told Farah whats in Islam ! I neither believe in it nor like it, but in Farah's "beautiful Islam", there is no concept of maintenance/alimony, which I think is very unfair ! The only exception is if, while the husband unilaterally divorces his wife and she is pregnant, then the husband will have to support her for 3 months, the so-called "iddat period" !
I agree with the rest of your comments.
If your marriage did not work the first time, it is likely that it won’t work the second time either. However, the solution is not necessarily in finding a new partner. The problem often lies on us rather than in the other person. There are many books that talk about how to have a loving and lasting marriage. Any person who wants to marry or is married and wants to have a more loving relationship should read a few of these books. You can find them on Amazon.com Read the reviews and buy one or order it from your library.
Hi Alissa,
Yours is a sad story but unfortunately it is too common. Abusive men can be found in all cultures and religions, but it is a fact that Muslim men are a lot more abusive than others. This has to do with Islamic values. Muhammad said men are superior to women الرِّجَالُ قَوَّمُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِ In the same verse (4:34) he said men can beat their wives if they fear disobedience. You don’t have to be disobedient to your husband. He can beat you if he fears that you may be disobedient.
You should not have returned to this man your dowry. What are you going to do with four children without money?
According to Islamic law if a man says he divorces you, you are divorced. But you live in a non-Muslim country and you need to get your formal divorce according to the civil law. Make sure you get child support from him for his own unborn child.
With four children, it is not going to be easy but you should get a job and try to be independent. It is also going to be tough to find a husband. However, if you look for one, don’t search someone in a mosque. Don’t marry a Muslim man again. Statistically speaking Muslim men are more abusive than others. You should leave Islam altogether. You need a new community to give you moral support. It is more likely that you find support in a church than in a mosque.
Go to a social worker and explain your situation. They will know about the laws and if you need a shelter, they may be able to help. At this moment, your main focus should be your children. Get all the help you can get from family and friends, but do everything possible to find a job so you won’t have to depend on others. If you live in a non-Muslim country, there are programs that help single mothers like you. Your social worker can advise you better.
Wish you luck
hi Ali Sina, i am a muslim woman living in an unislamic state. I'm married but the first set of children i have is for one man and i ended the relationship cause he was verbally and physically abusing me all the time. So we separated. Then i met my husband, he promised to take care of my children and i and i found just a week or two later that was not the situation, he started to make demands for me to send the kids by their father, i told him that the imam said that the father has only visitation rights he said that this is not an islamic state so the father has rights to the children, so i had agreed to let them stay with him during the week for the time so that they can attend school cause it's closer to him any ways. after that child well fair came into the picture cause the father became negligent to the children and would forget them on the bus stop for hours. they told me to take the children back from him,so i did but my husband didn't approve. then other problems started to arise and then he said the he didn't want my daughter there so i had to call my sister from the country to come take care of her and every time i will try having her over for a visit he will get verbally abusive and will stop putting down food and stop leaving money so i can take them to school. then he started lifting things at me to hit me and then one day during the month of Ramadan he finally let his true colors show. My 2 yr old son only unzip a bag and i didn't notice and that day the cooking gas had finished as well, tried to contact him no respond. we met at the masjid but forgot to tell him that he needs to get a cooking gas. later that day i remembered and try contacting him no respond. so got home later that evening from breaking fast at the masjid and saw him out side trying to light a fire. I said Salam but he didn't answer so i went inside, he came up shortly after and started to argue about the cooking gas, i tried to explain but wasn't given the chance, then he told me come into the room he needs to show me something else and he showed me the bag my 2 yr old unzip, i apologize quickly but he grew in a rage. i told him to seek refuge in Allah from satan but fire up more. and lift his hand as though he wanted to hit me so i put up my hand to protect myself from get hit cause i was almost 7 months pregnant then. then he said go by your sister i'm fed up with you and i said i was not going any where cause she is not the one who have me is this position so i will not place a burden on her. then i turn my head so i can make an exit and then he started to push me out and punch me in the back and the neck out to the hall way where my 3 children stood screaming for their mother and then i started to look for something to defend myself and try to take a pot cover to do so. He grab my hand and started to shake it to get the cover out and it dropped, so i turn my body slight and pushed him out with my foot and he said so you're kicking the dog. Then i said i'm only trying to get you of from me. Then i looked at my children with fear and terror in the eyes still crying and i got angry, so i took the pot cover slammed it down on top of the pot and said you are a wicked man what are you doing me in front of the children. and i swung it at him he ducked and he came after me again he scuffle with me and then i fell to the ground, i hang to his shirt he said let me go and i did and he stepped back. i got up, then i started to let out all the anger in me by saying all sorts of things and also used fowl languages cause i was so upset… I later ask for a divorce he didn't want to give me, so i waited for the month of ramadan to finish and i gave him back his dowry said to him, i'm not happy and i want my freedom and he said shukran Ja-zaa-kal-laah and took up the dowry, (i.e thank you, may ALLAH recompense /reward you.). what i will like to know i'm i divorce from him or are we still married…. please help…. may Allah reward you Insha-Allah.
slms all,i was married for a year and 4 months and i got divorced.i would like to know how do i go about in giving it a 2nd chance with my first wife
A couple posters already answered the "riddle". The same answer I arrived at when doing a 2 minute google search. The one and only answer to this question: Women in Islam can get a divorce for any reason what so ever, even if the husband refuses to consent to the divorce, by returning the dowry and any marital gifts.
Personally as a muslim man, I hate this. I thought I got to own my wife as property. But I guess not…it makes marriage less desirable to me.
Everyone is saying America is amazing and telling Farah to go to America and find a 'real man'. One whom would commit adultery, cheat, lie- the divorce and rape rates are so much higher in America- The American dream is bull.
CULTURE MATE NOT RELIGION
Women in Islam have many rights, Divorce is allowed although disliked but in Sara's circumstances she has every islamic legal right to divorce her husband. If her husband does not want to divorce her, she is able to go through islamic courts and apply for a Khul where she instigates the divorce. i am a muslim from England and finding it difficult to divorce my husband as he loves control, however after four consecutive periods after seperation divorce is valid.
You are clearly not a reader Jakob. You would not be making the kind of ignorant statements you make if you had read your religion's books. People here have read your books, and all the kaffirs here know more about Islam than you.
Why is that Jakob? Are you lazy? Why haven't you read the Quran and Sunna?
I married a Musim man, also, and he didn't love me. Chances are this guy told you a lot of pretty lies to get what he wanted. You have to make yourself understand that you loved a lie. As Dr. Sina mentioned, Arab culture is Narcisscist. They only care what people think. As long as you believed in him, it doesn't matter that he is a total liar and a user.
My husband told me that Islam cherishes women, and then spent the next 8 months abusing me DAILY, 8 times a day or more.
Listen to his actions, not his words.
'' Believe me, it will save you a lot of time over trying to do all original research yourself. ''
Study it yourself if you still do not like Islam then so be that is your view.
''In fact, if you disagree with the articles on this site, then you are an apostate who does not believe Islam''
This comment is not logical at all.
The articles are here to stir up people to hate Islam and plays on those who are lazy and do not want to see if the accusations are true.
Example the picture is implying all Muslims men abuse there wives and the other picture on a woman in a face covering with the bars over the eyes imply's the women's rights are violated (If you even knew what the face covering was you would know this is not true)
Yes some abuse woman but in all religions or cultures you have those that do this act
The Quran does not teach violence towards women at all it teaches the complete opposite
Read and learn
Regards Jakob
you are stupid rasheeda. your advise only good in arab world. in free world nobody listen to you. who cares about kaffir in the free world. it means nothing. you are very stupid
Jakob,
Dr Sina already told us many times that Islam is evil religion. He provided facts and proves based on the Quran. How can you say Islam is not evil ? Can you provide the prove ? What are trying to say?
it is not just like any other religions. not at all. no other religion taught to kill other people. not the same at all.
no, your comment did not help at all.
Ali Sina is not standing alone. He will gain many supports sooner. You know why ? because he is trying to tell the truth. He is trying to uncover the lies. He did not speak with his imagination but he provided the facts. Everything he said he provided the fact from the Quran. Billions of people will thank him sooner or later, including you and your family.
Believe me. More and more people in Europe and North America already awake now. They are now more prepare to deal with this ideology. We should thank him for his courage.
For christens you all sure have alot of hate in your heart. Don't worry though I am not like you, I will not judge an entire religion on your own personal bias views.
What would Jesus think about inciting hatred and slander?
What would Mary mother of Jesus think of ''real men'' and ''real woman'' abusing the rights of a women wearing the hijjab?
Do any of you even know what it means to wear the hijjab rather then the ''they are forced to wear a ugly face covering by terrorist who violate woman's rights'' ?
dann: Show me one christen country that is perfect look at all of the ''free countries''
USA: Free democratic country that wages war on any other country it chooses and still has the death penalty .No health care with alot of there people living on food stamps and are starving. Extremely high STI's due to loose behaviour (including a new antibiotic resisted VD ) High corruption. Flawed legal system
Australia: High crime rate: People getting away with murder by car and weapon, heavy drug offences, high corruption. Can be charged if you defend yourself in a fight of defend your own home when someone breaks in. Incitement of hatred on big families, poor and those on disability pensions.
high loose behaviour like the USA.
Shall I go on ?
Regards Jakob
Why is this so important? This man lives half a world away, why do you give a damn? Its no one else`s business if you are married or not, i am sure the vast majority of australians don`t care anyway.
Hi all, I am an Iranian woman now living in Australia. I have lived apart from my muslim husband (who still lives in Iran) for over 2 years now and wish to get divorced. Im not an Australian citizen as yet but I do have an a permernant visa.
Can anyone please advise me as to how to go about doing this in Australia?
Right. Generally domestic violence is an anger-control problem that anyone anywhere can have. But you are right that in Islam it is not controlled, but encouraged.
hi
I agree that there are cruel men across the globe. but compared to other religion cruelty is not made legitimate by religion as made in Islam
muslims says islam is realigen of peace but where? show one country. women get abused mostly in islamic countries. islam is nothing but teeth of elephant , eating teeth diffrent and showing diffrent. if you want freedom, peace then you have to leav islam.
Scrutator THATS CRAP YOU TOLD FARAH, SHE NEEDS CHILD SUPPORT FROM THIS LOSER DOG HUSBAND, FARAH GET YOUR CHILD SUPPORT AND COME TO AMERICA AND MEET AND REAL MAN, THEY ARE OUT THERE, THOSE KIDS NEED MONEY NOT A BS BOOK , THAT DOESN,T FEED THEM, THIS IDIOT who told you to give the man his money or gift back is taking food from your childern, you OWE him nothing, come to america , and just forget the dog he doesn,t support his kids anyway this is 2011. stand up for your kids and yourself.thanks women in texas who doesn,t buy your backword 18th century garbage, rasie your kids find a good man and take those HOT ridickulus cloths of f your body,s there ungy and they smell bad in the heat,plus having a scarf on your head all the time is bad for your beatiful hair. my god you people .are so ignorant.
rasheeda. you are so BLIND, why would anybody in thier right mind worry about getting a divorce thats muslim living in a free country, huh, this is america women in any free country should just get rid of the male dog and go on with her life gee weez you people live so far in the dark ages why don,t you just go to afganistan , and live there and e mail about your children being raped and women with acid thrown in there faces, by these muslim male dogs, good luck trying too tell someone to go to the so called high guy in your masque and ask for a 16th century DIVIORCE, . GET A LIFE. in 2011 . BELIVE IT OR NOT THE MUSLIM RELIGLION IS A CROCK AND PEOPLE ARE STARTING TO SEE IT. I read the the BOOK, and the sex in it is perverted, I through it in the garbage, happy in texas. geez
that is not true, FRAIDA. DO YOU LIVE IN AMERICA .you must because in the middle east you would not be on this internet. I am a american women who DID marry a man from pakistan and he is muslim , the first time he called me a bad name . well i,m from texas so i won,t tell you what i did but he learned alot before i threw him out the front door with his carpet, women of muslim faith that live in america are free to do as they please, not in the middle east. the muslim religion is a lie. anyway.
TO FARAH
Farah, you write "My beautiful religion however, teaches me to do right by my husband so that he may do right by me."
Farah dear, you have not forgotten your "beautiful religion" allows your husband to divorce you anytime and he does not have to provide any reason for his actions ! He can substitute you with a younger woman anytime; the Quran says he will not have to pay you alimony for divorcing you.
So, you can expect your husband to be "right" towards you only till such time as he decides to get rid of you !!
its called KHULA. look it up, and you are muslim??? never let anyone tell you to divorce by australian law and for your status to be non muslim, it will make you a KAFFIR! you are not divorced islamically, do it correctly.
You may use derogatory words for Ali Sina but the fact of the matter is that till now, no one has proven him wrong on the subject of your religion.
We would all like to understand and sincerely (if we find the opportunity) appreciate the multi dimensional theory for the above teachings of Islam especially in the context of women from you.
Furthermore, let me correct you, men are emotionally weaker than females and this is scientifically proven. Yes men are physically stronger than females.
Female abuse takes place everywhere but nowhere does it have the sanction by the religious scriptures except Islam.
You need to get your facts clear, spend some time on none else but your own so to say divine texts and then come back and refute any argument being put across.
Kind regards,
Prithvi
You talk of liberating, would you explain to us how especially when it is said that you are
1. Deficient in intelligence.
2. Your testimony is half to that of a man.
3. You cannot fast without your husband’s permission.
4. You cannot say no to your husband’s sexual urge even if you are running temperature and if you do say no, then angels would curse you till the morning.
5. You are only supposed to see the outside world from behind a veil – in practicality because there would always be other men outside.
6. You cannot divorce your husband at will.
7. You cannot listen to some music of your choice.
8. You cannot put a painting in your home of your choice.
9. You are promised your old husband whereas your husband is promised 72 black eyed virgins to have sex with in paradise.
10. You will have to sleep with another man for a reunion with your original husband in case by mistake he divorces you someday.
11. You are supposed to be loyal but your husband can have up to 4 wives.
12. Your husband can sleep with any woman by marrying her for a night – Muta marriage
13. Your husband can maintain another woman or mistress – Misyar.
Cont.
Farah,
You cannot blame Ali Sina for having a morbid view of Islam because that is precisely how the history of Islam is.
Can you please enlighten us all about the other contexts, if more than one for the below statements,
1. Women are deficient in intelligence – Muhammad
2. I have not left any affliction more harmful to men than women – Muhammad
3. If there is evil omen in anything, it is in the house, the woman and the horse – Muhammad
4. Majority of the dwellers of hell were women – Muhammad
We all would like to understand the multi context of the above statements made by none other than the person whom you worship and love more than your parents also, Muhammad.
Cont.
Hi Ms farah, kindly don't degrade all women by saying that women are less capable than men. Maybe you are indeed really less capable than your husband or all the men in the world, but not me and the rest of the women on planet earth! So, please don't put me and the rest of the women in the world to be in the same boat as you. It's a shame. How can a man like Dr Ali Sina understand why a dumb woman like you will insult all the women in the world to be as dumb as you?
Don't you know that by just one dimentional looking at Islam is good enough for Dr Ali Sina to expose all the blatant lies lying therein because it is a pack of lies? How can a braindead zombie like you say that my dear Dr Ali Sina is closed minded and offensive? Don't you know that you are worst off than him? Your brain is dead and it lets off an offensive smell as it rot.
Hi Ms farah, I assume that you're not living in the Middle East countries ie. Afghanistan, Pakistan or Saudi Arabia. Please visit all these Islamic nations and do open your eyes big enough to see how 'beautiful' your religion treat the muslimahs ie. See how the muslimahs are wrapped up like a mummy with the black cloth and how they treated by the authorities like an alien from Mars. Let me remind you that even a dog enjoys more freedom than a muslimah in Afghanistan. If possible, please spent some money and conduct a country wide survey or personal interview with all the muslimahs living there and see if they are really happy to be bound by so many ridiculous Sharia laws.
Farah,
Let me get this straight. Islam taught you that:
1. Women are less capable than men.
2. Women have deeper emotion than men. Thus,
3. Women’s judgements are cloudy.
I’m sorry, are these statements connected to what you said earlier about your beautiful religion (Islam)? How so?
Dear Mr/Ms Farah, I believe that when you finally come to the realization that Islam is just a pack of lies concorted by an uneducated, stupid and monstrous liar prophet, you'll apologize to my dear Dr Ali Sina for your above comments.
Muhammad said women are deficient in intelligence. Will you explain how this is liberating women? He said men are superior to women and recomended men to beat their wives if the “fear” that they may disobay them. This is liberation in your opinion eh?
Please read about women before and after Islam http://alisina.org/women-before-and-after-islam/
Farah, you just don't like what your texts say. Will you cut out all the passages that support Dr. Sina? Will you bury your head in the sand like an ostrich so you cannot see the facts? I'm afraid that if you work as hard as you can, it will be a long time before you have as much education on Islam as Dr. Sina.
Sam, you are reacting emotionally to the threat to your beliefs. If you bothered to read the facts presented by Dr. Sina you would agree that he is right.
Ali Sina.
Your view of Islam is somewhat morbid, and highly uneducated, not to mention largely out of context,
The verses you have quoted are to be understood in a certain context, which clearly you were not able to do. Islam has done nothing but liberate me, many see the hijjab I wear as oppressive but to the uneducated, that’s all they would see. The beauty of Islam allows women to be seen and judged for the intelligence and capabilities and not their assets. Whereas none muslim women are seen and judged for the way in which they look and dress. It is my strong belief that it is none muslims who are oppressed into wearing little clothing, and doing degrading things, because unfortunately for them, that’s what they are taught. Subhanallah we as muslims have been blessed with a world which is more than just one dimensional and one sided. Islam has many layers that must be learned about in order to witness its true beauty.
I must also point out that when one decides to refer to an article to highlight their point, its common sense for that article to not be written by the uneducated individual who Is trying to make the point.
Kind regards.
Farah
1.5 billion muslims worldwide dont mean islam is right. 1000yrs ago most people believed earth is flat and is the center of the universe. 500yrs ago most people believed flying is impossible. 100yrs ago most people believed space travelling is impossible.
Ali Sina, You sure have some mental issues, why don't you try to perform therapy on a subject you might know a little about (I doubt if you know anything about anything). From the way you write, i feel bigotry against 1.5 billion people in the world. You are standing alone and you must be lacking something tremendous to bash billions of people around the world and their religion. You are extremely illiterate so disappear and get a life…
It depends on what country you live in as to whether you even need to acknowledge Sharia law. If the court has no legal status and the marriage is not legally registered, you can just leave and who cares what the Muslims think about it.
I totally agree with Merima. When we are planning for a divorce we also need to think on those lines. What is it that the husband was not able to provide us that we need a divorce. If it is the affairs of the husband and he is not able to get out of it, then it is a different case.
You can ask for a divorce and it will be final in three months period of time as long as no reconciliation is made and no sex is between you. Your best alternative is to LEARN your religion. As the answer above states the prophet granted divorce as long as you return your marriage gift. it is not allowed for your husband to stay married to you just to be cruel. Apparently you have no stated your case correctly to whomever it needs to be stated to. In Australia there is no Islamic laws. As long as you follow the proper procedure according to Islam you will be divorced. May will try to tell you differently but they lie and contort the truth. In India women are still giving men dowry Astagfirallah! This is not allowed in Islam. Be precise when practicing Islam. It is not a man's religion but men contort it. Islam rescued women from oppression and many others from the oppression of slavery and usery. it is the culture surrounding the religion which tends to oppress. EDUCATE yourself on Islam and learn your religion….
This will save you and help you make a good solid case for yourself and your children. Inshallah. May Allah bless you and help you Ameen.
You must be kidding.
sister ofcurse u can divorce.You are allowed to divorce a man (or ask for divorce would be a good alternative bt not in ur case…)if :
1_ he doesnt provide yu, food, clothing, cosmetics
2_if he is mistreating you
3_u can kick his ass if he doesnt sleep with you moe than half year
4_if he doesnt take care of your kids
_____Usually ppl will say , no, shes only allowed to ASK for divorce, but as we remember, a woman came to prophet and asked him to divorce a man just because she didint like him,and Prophet s.a.w.s allowed her, but he told her to give him (husband) the wedding present back
This is the first time I hear that women in Islam have rights !
This is the most ludicrous problem I have ever heard.
In fact, there is no problem. You are divorced, it is over, you are free.
As for that paper of the Islamic marriage, give it to you ex and
let him wipe his rear with it.
You said you are 62 ! I am sorry to say that you wasted your life learning nothing.
He is just using you sexually, because he found a female that is available and handy.
This marriage you mentioned is called "Mott'aa" or a pleasure marriage. It has no commitments
and no obligations, it could last for one month, one day, even one hour. No legal papers
involved, it is just a mutual consent.
When I read your problem, I thought you are a girl in your twenties. I was shocked to know
that you reached this age (62) and you are still troubled by sexual problems.
Are you telling me that you really do not know that he was using you?
If so, you sounded to me as if you were born yesterday.
Sorry to be so hard on you.
seems like your writting this letters yourself ali sina lol, cracking read tho, lol
can you go back to the shaykh who married you .? can he write a khula for your husband to sign (of course he wont but procedure ) then use your reasons for persuing it further as blunt. you hate him— this is grounds after 1 year seperation i believe if you leave the money and anything he gave you with the shayk that married you for him to collect the shayk should give you annulment inshallah —-thats excatly what im doing
Salaam,
Every woman has the right to divorce if the man is not treating the wife with respect , not providing for the wife and children,threatening, slandering and not treating them as an equals ect.
The sheiks have no right to disallow a divorce in this case as you are put through hardship, being persecuted and could argue that they are being hypocritical and contradicting the quran.
Islam is not a man religion or evil, but there are alot of radicals highjacking a peaceful religion and trying to justify their biases and personal hatred towards woman, christans, jews and other muslims ect (just like other religions)
Hope this comment helps
-Jakob
You pretend? I don't think so:D
In the name of Allah the All Compassionate the All merciful, with what little knoweldge I have I shall try to advise you best as I can, not in my own words but from reliable sourse. Please sister, I suggest you go to another Mosque, or get Islamic Legal books to make a case for yourself with Sheiks. It is there obligation to help you in this matter. I am neither Sunni or Shia, I am but a Muslim, I have a book called "The rights of women in Islam" it is from Iran and was written by a Shia, please quote to the Sheiks, "Indeed, We sent Our Messengers with clear signs, and We sent down with the the Book and the Balance so that men might uphold justice." (Quraan 57:25.) I then suggest that you can also quote – via Abu Basir, , Iman as-Sadiq (a.s) said: "If there is anyone who has a wife and does not arrange for her dress and does not provide for her maintainance, it is obligatory on the leader of the Muslims to enforce a seperation between them (through divorce)" Advise them that your rights have been neglected and this is not the way of Islam or Muslims and that you have a right to a divorce after being seperated for so long as well, failing this might cause you to sin and this is not what you want to do. That is all I can offer you on this subject. If they shall not help you I sugest you find an online Scholar who might be able to help or intervene on your behalf. if they refuse I suggest you try to find a Sunni Imam / Scholar or similar. We are all muslim and divorce is divorce as it is clearly outlined in the Holy Quraan.
However,whatever it is I gather that it’s obvious that a person who left islam won’t have anything positive to say about islam. They are off the track, anyway hopefully Allah the Almighty will always protect my imaan not to be out off the track. Masyaallah….
I do not really know which Islamic Texts that you have been reading. I do read and interpret Al'Quran, never come across saying that Islam allow beating the women. This is a big mistakes that I think this Islamic Texts is purposely done by some human that hates or against Islam or just a make up texts. That is why, I repeat…they should study and understand Islam bcoz " Islam is a way of life'. In Islam itself there are so many groups and beliefs. I'm a Sunnah Waljama'ah and I do not agree with the Shi'ite believing. Shi'ite in my country is against the law bcoz they under rate women. So to be a good muslim we should always be aware of the teachings given by the Ustadz. Yes I did read about the articles on this site and yet I do not agree with most of the information given. And also the make up pictures shown is a very bad one. Regarding Lina Joy,well she does not understand Islam, nobody is chasing after her it's just a make up stories. Pity her parents and families who brought her up very well, full of passion and love but she betrayed them. Is that fair enough?
You obviously are not aware that Islamic texts allow the beating of women. You are still in the ignorant phase where Islam means that which is good and that which is bad is un-Islamic. You need to study the articles on this site and Dr. Sina's book, Understanding Muhammad to learn about the real Islam, not the make-believe Islam you have been taught for a purpose.
Please do not miss understood Islam. Even the non muslim can be abusive and cruel towards woman. It happens everywhere in this world, does not matter whether he/she is a muslim or not. But I think muslim men that abuse their wives is the one who does not practice and does not understand islamic law themselves. They should study and understand more about islamic law. Islam is very beautiful, there's nothing wrong about this religion only that human being does not practice in according to the islamic law. Please understand this and be more open minded instead of making it more confusing. Allah the Almighty is Great and being very fair…
Oh I just pretend to be wise. 😉
Very wise man this Ali Sina. I red througout your comments and I have to say that I was truly impressed!
Please read this article to learn how Islam elevates women http://alisina.org/women-before-and-after-islam/ Also this http://alisina.org/does-islam-elevate-women/
John,
You call me ignorant and yet you are influenced by the media. You talk about the reports in the news when it is commonly known that the news is biased. You will find a negative article on the front page and if a newspaper is forced to post a retraction it will be somewhere in the back taking up at most 2 lines.
If you really want to know the truth about how women feel and 'How they are controlled by men' then ask the women in these Islam controlled societies. Ask them about the protection and safety most of them feel under the guidance of Islam. You take verses of the Quran out of context and show the world what a terribly backward religion Islam is. Read the verses in full or get a translation and you will understand what the true context it is written in.
Get your facts right by researching the information yourself rather than playing Chinese whisper on what you hear yourself. Be open-minded if you really want to know the truth!
Didn’t Muhammad say women are deficient in intelligent? Wasn’t he who said if you fear they disobey you, beat them? Is that the right you are talking about?
There are many verses in the holy Quran and it would be impossible to mention them all but for your information here are a few:
"O You who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will, and you should not treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the Mahr (bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at time of marriage) you have given them, unless they commit open illegal sexual intercourse. And live with them honorably. If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allah brings through it a great deal of good." (An-Nisa 4:19)
Islam considers a woman to be equal to a man as a human being and as his partner in this life. Women have been created with a soul of the same nature as man’s. Allah (SWT) says in the Quran:
"O mankind! Be dutiful to your Lord, Who created you from a single person (Adam), and from him (Adam) He created his wife (Eve), and from them both He created many men and women and fear Allah through Whom you demand your mutual (rights), and (do not cut the relations of) the wombs (kinship). Surely, Allah is Ever and All-Watcher over you." (Al-Nisa 4:1)
And in the words of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW),
"Assuredly, women are the twin halves of men." (Sahih reported by Abu-Dawud (RA)
I am not a scholar of Islam but I try to research the truth rather than believe hearsay. I have found Dr Zakir Naik (just one of the many videos posted http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pvi-g88d5XI ) to have a wealth of true knowledge in Islam and would suggest to anyone who is interested to follow his lectures to understand the truly BEAUTIFUL RELIGION ISLAM.
[youtube pvi-g88d5XI http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pvi-g88d5XI youtube]
Thanks for your comment, but your story only confirms what I said. Your husband left Islam, so you are not married to a Muslim.
Good grief Islam promoter? What country do you live in? The reports we see in the news are representative of society where Islam has control. The only places it is the way you think are in the West where Imam's don't dare behave that way. But I know Muslim culture dominates Muslim communities in the West so that women live in fear anyway, which is why people think that posts like yours are taqiyya.
So a beautiful religion? What should I like about Islam? The command to kill unbelievers wherever you find them? The command to stone women for adultery? The command to cut hands off thieves? Gee, what beautiful images your religion conjures. Islam gives no rights to women. It is the most misogynistic system on the earth. Islam is Muslim culture. Do not come onto the internet with ignorance and tell people with more knowledge than you that they do not know anything. You only make yourself look like a fool because you have not prepared yourself with knowledge. There is no such thing as a positive point in Islam, and there are no successful Muslim marriages. If there are happy Muslims, it is because they have not let Islam into their lives.
muslim men are cruel , they kill the baby when its a girl, thats why u see many muslim boy in the west, not many are aware of these facts, they think this is the way to take over europe by converting white girls who are not aware of their evil intentions
please name me the quran verses that promotes freedom and liberty to woman, either ur not aware of the quran text or you are playing a game with non muslims. I bet reading ur comment ur not aware of the anti-women surahs in the quran.
Dear All,
You are commenting about a beautiful religion which you know nothing about. Islam was the first religion to give women rights and it has laws in place to avoid abuse. Please do not confuse culture with religion, it is the culture which allows tmen to get away with such disgusting acts of violence. If Islam was followed then women will always benefit, there are a great many benefits in place for women in all areas of life.
There are many Muslim women in the world living happily within the laws of their religion, only because the negative issues and problems are reported it does not mean that Islam is bad. If the positive points of Islam and the successful Muslim marriages were reported as often then there would be no question about the religion itself.
Regards
I had this same problem when I was wanting to get divorced from my first husband who was a psychotic Muslim. He swore to ruin me, my reputation, to have me deported from his country, to have me killed, to have his family kill me, and that I would never be able to return to his country. He also left me completely bankrupt, with a child, in a foreign country – his – without our passports. Well, he was wrong. I got my divorce due to his own stupidity and rage, and I did come back to his country. The first place I went was to where we lived before, to show everybody he knows, including his family, that he did NOT win his sick little game. When he saw me back in HIS country, talking to HIS friends, he looked like he swallowed a dog (haram) haha 🙂 It was the best thing I ever did. I enjoyed my 2 week holiday with my friends, found a new boyfriend, and showed him I was happy. Because the police knew the history between he and I, even though they did nothing to help me when I begged them while we were married a few years before, they watched him carefully. According to them, I was no longer his wife, so I was no longer his 'property'. They would now 'protect' me. Sick and twisted, yes, but the truth.
As for John's comment that all Muslim men end up hurting their wives, I can tell you that's not true. I married my current husband when he was still Muslim. He ended up leaving Islam of his own accord and is now Buddhist. Even when he was Muslim, he never treated me as a piece of property or with even the slightest amount of disrespect. We've been together now approximately 7 years. Is a Muslim man like that rare? Yes, most definitely. Extremely rare, in my experience. Most I've met are sexist pigs and treat all women, including their mothers and sisters, like slaves and chattle. But there is the rare one out there that doesn't.
I am sure that common humanity is a statistical bell curve throughout the world, but Islam's culture conditions people to accept bad behavior as normal.
There are too many stories of the same kind from Western women who have married Muslims and it always turns out the same. Muslim men living in the West who want to get away from Islam and be Western inevitably are drawn back to their country and religion and end up hurting their Western wives.
It's not worth the chance. It's a ticking time bomb.
Thanks for sharing this heart-breaking story.
Hi Farida. That would be based on the goodness of the men in your family, not Islamic doctrine.
Congratulations on your brave choice, Nadia. You will not be truly free until you leave Islam. Join the free world. Start with Ali Sina's book, Understanding Muhammad:
http://alisina.org/understanding-muhammad/
ali Sine…not all Muslim men are the same… Please stop ur nonsense about not dating a Muslim man. There are abusive men all over the map, no matter their religion or race.
Hi Juliet,
Of course he lied to you. He did not marry you. Marriage is a ceremony that you do in front of other witnesses to solemnize and announce your commitment to each other. That is the purpose of marriage everywhere in the world. This rascal wanted sex and he was not honest enough to say it. Instead he lied to you. You harbored false hopes and now you are heartbroken.
Go to plentyoffish.com and find a serious man to date and befriend. There are good people out there, as also there are charlatans. Make sure you don’t date a Muslim. They are a different breed. As long as they are Muslim they can’t feel their humanity.
Take care and be happy.
I am American. I fell in love with a Muslim and he married us in my living room "in front of Allah," so that he could have sex with me. He told me that he could not touch any of my private parts, as he prays with his hands and mouth. He told me that he could not actually LOVE me, as he is only to love Allah. He never even spent one night with me and would leave me alone for weeks on end. I broke it off in an e-mail and have had no response. I was not a virgin and a Christian, so I suppose any "rules" (which he stated there ARE NO RULES IN ISLAM) did not apply to me. I am having a very hard time getting over him, as I have never loved a man sexually nor chemically so very much ever before. I am 62, he 40. Was he lying to me all along? Because I questioned him on the "legality" of such a marriage, that he should love his wife, and why won't you touch me?
Would just appreciate the Muslim opinion as he has me questioning what I could have done to keep him.
Thank you.
Juliet
aslumalikum my sister ailsinai may allah give u jannat ur wry have touch my heart so much that I now how u felling ur hobby shud be great full hamdulilah that he’s got beutifull wife and mashallah kids wat else does he want on the plate he lost his sakoon and ur too I’m from uk and I’m in pain too I now hw u fell I was 15 my stepdad use to abuse me so my mom went to get me married off it wasn’t my choice never had a father love so wen I got married I had to stay wiv him for 1 year I could cum bk till I was17 it was my first time away from home I was kid I’m 21 june I have never loved him from now till before i have try too but its not I cant suffer more it tuesday made my mind up now I want devorise they family people tak abut wohhh she keep her respect for 5 year without her husband I did because of my mom 2 eyes I never loved him not the really has cum had to tell before he cums in uk people family are going to tak rather than runaway I myt aswell have devorise I did that on sunday it was so huge I have shut my wrl down sister I don’t sleep no eat u now second is I’m going to stand on my2 feet wk till gave money my family said 1 years or 2 years u have to get married u have to live wiv ur life move on my was no choice but inshallah ill do my choice I have to be strong he’s going to be in uk I’m syed bhari u have to get married in family they shud seem my happiness to too ok sis have a devorse move away from him the way y say he is I think he’s wore than shatann he going to burn in he’ll end day ur kid ur babysitter ur mum he dint support u get help now before sis to late ok sis allah hafiz may allah take our all sis tension away ameen
It’s a hell different in the country where I live in. We have 2 sets of law here. One is the syaria law and the other is the Federal Law.
It’s really confusing actually. How can you have 2 types of law in one country? Especially when it’s regarding about renouncing Islam. according to the federal law, everyone have the rights to choose and change their religion. But if you are a muslim, the law does not implement to you. You will be directed straight to syaria’ court. Only the judge in the syaria’ court have the right to determine whether you are still a muslim or officially considered as apostate.
It’s a complete non-sense! If a muslim admits that he/she has renounce Islam, that means that the person is no longer a muslim. I don’t think it’s necessary to go to the syaria court anymore. How can someone’s faith and believe is determine by the word of another human being just because that he is the syaria’ judge?
It’s between you and God. Like the case of Lina Joy ( try searching the web and you’ll see what I mean). she was born from a malay family( of course if you are a malay then you are officially Islam). When she grew up, she changes her religion to christianity. She was baptised secretly. Not long after that, she wanted to marry her boyfriend who is a christian. she made an application to change her religion in her identity card to christian but it was turned down. She can only make the change if she had the permission from the syaria court stating that she was no longer a muslim. she took her case to the federal court. But the judge refuse to take her case because she was a muslim and she should take her case to the syaria court instead. This poor woman was so devastated.
so she took her case to the syaria court, and she lost her case. The judge never gave her the permission to leave islam. And as the result, she is now forced to live into hiding. Afraid that the Islamic authority will find her and take her to the Islamic rehabilitation camp.
It’s really hard to live in this kind of situation. You can see freedom on the other side of the rainbow, but you can never reach it because if you are a muslim there are no freedom for you
I am a woman from a Muslim family and I never once had the impression that men are masters. We take decisions either democratically or individually, (depending on who would be affected) even though my father is the main wage earner of the household.
I'd also like to point out that we live (largely) in a patriarchal society, and that this is constant across countries, cultures, and religions.
Women are emotional and so are men. There is nothing wrong in being emotional. We humans are emotional, rational, spiritual, sexual, and all other "als". That does not mean anyone has less rights. Men are not superior to women. If there is a marital problem there are counselors and courts that can help, it is not up to husband to decide. This very concept that men are the masters is the source of evil and the downfall of the Islamic world.
Dear Sister Sara,
I am a Shia Muslim too and unfortunately i am also going through the same problem but i can never blame Islam because i know the rules are simple and straight forward, at the time of marriage you did the right thing by not taking the right of divorce and letting it in the hand of your husband because it's a fact that women are emotional so the right of divorce should remain in the hand of husband but in Islam if your husband treats you bad, doesn't fulfill his religious obligations towards wife then you have the right to ask for (Khulla), if husbands doesn’t give one then you can take this matter to a supreme scholars and it will take some time but eventually you will get it unless you are hiding the facts because yes you cannot get divorce if your husband has not done any harm to you and it's you who were at fault in any case you should fulfill your husband’s demands with mutual understand and convince him for what you want if there is no chance of reconciliation. Please let me know if you need any further help, i can get you in touch with those scholars, please mind it again nothing can be done if you are at fault.
Fi Amanillah.
Hi Sara,
I'm in Australia too – you know that if you have your decree absolute from the Family Court – it is all over…regardless of what members of the community may think. Islamic law is not recognised here, so it's a pointless worry, and a wasted emotion – put the same amount of effort into smiling at everyone you see, and planning for the future instead! Hug your kids, read a book, go for a walk – anything but worry about what other's may think of you.
You have stated that you are "well respected and known …. for your honesty, purity and as a human itself"…no true friend or loved one would think any differently about you for the sake of a non-legal rubber stamp on a dead-in-the-water relationship that's been over for four years…and if they do, doesn't that show you the true worth of that person? (Nil – in my opinion, and in the opinion of the majority of Australians I would think!)
If your family and friends are going to be judgmental about not having a religious divorce, then what makes you think that they are not going to be judgmental after one?? Doesn't separation have the same stigma attached already? True love and friendship looks past circumstances into the heart of the person…true friends will stand by you, regardless.
Rumours and spiteful stories are just that – rumours and spiteful stories…you know the truth, your kids know the truth, your family knows the truth (whether they choose to support you or not) – that's all that matters.
You have stated that you want to get away from Islam – maybe the first step is going to be walking away from the belief that you need an Islamic Divorce? Australia is an accepting country – the majority of Australians don't even know what religion their neighbour is, let alone the in's and out's of their personal life – it doesn't matter here. You know the saying " a fair go"? That's what the majority of Aussies believe…truly!
Distance yourself from the people who would hurt you through spite, go to Centrelink and enquire about any services you are not receiving (if any), get out the white pages or the internet and look up multicultural women's groups, friendship groups, single mum's groups etc – put on a fabulous dress and some lipstick – and go forward to meet your new life!
We have a beautiful country, filled with great people and gorgeous scenery. We have opportunities for our kids and ourselves, great education, almost free medical care, government funding for single mums, free legal assistance if required, freedom of thought and peace – please don't waste another second giving this man any power over your life. (That's the whole point of a divorce!)
Cheers from Oz.
Maybe you should also read Ali Sina's book…